I wrote  a while back about the hot young jock who was coming to NYC and wanted to be my live-in boy (after a trial period where he had his own place). Then a couple weeks before he was supposed to be here, he dropped off the face of the earth – never heard from him again.

Well, the latest installment of “too good to be true” was a rich, young plastic surgeon who was coming to town for a conference and wanted to hookup with me… From the beginning things just didn’t add up… For starters he said he was interested in videotaping the fuck and didn’t mind having his face show. That raised serious question marks. What successful doctor would want the reputation of being in a bareback gay porn video (taking loads)?

Then he started asking if I wanted to do 3ways and groups with some of his friends. Generally I’m OK with that, but I wondered what sorta scenario he was looking for. Then he asked “do you like to party with other Tops or just Bottoms?” And I thought, “oh god – this is the PNP crowd” – too much money and lots of drugs. I quizzed him on it and he swore he didn’t do drugs. But there was just this overtone to what he said that was totally party boy / playboyish – I didn’t believe him a bit when he said he didn’t PNP. I was starting to see that he fit a certain type – and I’m not really all that into that type. The A-type personality rich boys and me never get along all that well – I’m way more mellow and “real”

He was supposed to be here a couple days ago, but I didn’t hear from him. Then he said he was delayed because there was some big accident and a bunch of people needed plastic surgery. Then I got these IMs and one of them had his full name and title. I googled him and looked on the hospital’s website and couldn’t find any trace of a doctor by that name (or a variation of that name). Add to that, he said his last name was Vanderbilt. I was now really suspicious – things just weren’t adding up.

He kept pushing his persona – saying he could have his driver pick me up, that he was staying at the Ritz Carlton on Park Avenue South (after telling me earlier he was staying at the Mandarin). But that didn’t make sense either… What doctor (attending a conference) needs a driver in NY? Use cabs for god’s sake. You only need a driver if you’re going from place to place and have packages.  I know enough doctors to know they just don’t live like that. One of the doctors I know is a brain surgeon at a world-renown hospital with at least 10 more years experience than this guy (who’s in his early 30s). The brain surgeon is LOADED and spends his money, but he’d never spend it like this guy… Even with the Nip/Tuck stereotype lifestyle built in, it didn’t add up…

Then when we were actually supposed to hookup he starts asking about whether I’d be into particular other guys… He sent me a bunch of pics and asked which one I wanted to hookup with…

Of course all those guys are hot. When he asked me “Which guy do you like better”? My response was “whichever one is most into bears”. I then mentioned groups are a bit of a chemistry thing. He didn’t get it. I was sitting there thinking the last thing I wanted was to be a 3rd wheel in group of jocks who were only into other jocks.

We chatted a bit more, while he said he read the blog, he seemed to think I looked like I did when I was in Dawson’s 20 Load Weekend. I told him that was 6 years ago – I didn’t look like that any more. I sent him a pic showing I now have a belly. He was still pressing on who I wanted to hookup with and not understanding when I said I wanted to hookup with guys who were into bears.

Then he started asking me weird questions like do I fuck with my clothes on all the time (no), would I take out my PA (of course), and was I planning on wearing a hood (not unless we’re doing video)? Then he told me the hood was scary. I told him that was sorta the point of it – it’s an executioner’s hood. Then he got all defensive and said “I know what it is, I have 3 doctorate degrees”. I just laughed at that comment – exactly what doctoral program had a class on executioner’s hoods? Plus, who gets 3 doctoral degrees?  I know a lot of people who are academic overachievers – he didn’t strike me as the type. And none of the academic overachievers I know have 3 Ph.D.’s (and Ph.D’s are pretty common in my family).

At that point I knew the guy was total bullshit. I mean things just didn’t add up –  1) flawless jock, 2) party boy, 3) crazy rich, 4) total playboy, 5) sexually obsessed, 6) lots of hot jock friends, 7) 3 doctoral degrees by his early 30s, and 8) a great job. I’m sorry, but too many of those things are contradictory. I didn’t know what he was, but I was convinced by that point 1) he wasn’t into guys like me, and 2) he was a huge liar.

Then he kept going on…

I can’t help we are all into the way our bodies look
It is not because we are Plastic and Recon Surgeons either, I for one only treat tauma patients
We are all very educated with great personalities, none of us are superficial
Maybe you are more into twink looking guys? I don;t know, if that is true, that is ok, no offense will be taken
…
I kinda think you are placing me into a category just because I have a great body

(Oh yeah, all his hot jock friends were also rich plastic surgeons… right…)

Then as I was responding he logged off (nice). My response was…

no, i’m placing you in a category because all the other guys you’re into have great bodies…
if there was more diversity in who you were into i’d be a hell of a lot more comfortable.
if i were a muscle bear, i’d fit in pretty well…
but i’ve been around the block enough to know what situations work and what don’t. this one feels all wrong.

He connected long enough to see my response, then disconnected. A little while later he sent me an e-mail…

I am sorry I e-mailed you, I should have known you were going to be scared to meet someone that looked like me.

I just shook my head and wrote the following response…

You’re not understanding me… I am not scared – at all… I’ve had great 1-on-1 sex with guys just as hot as you. There are guys like you who are into “real men” and bears, but you don’t seem to be one of them – all your fuck buddies are body beautiful types. This isn’t about what you look like. It’s about who you (and your friends) are attracted to.

I had a full week of work last week, worked all weekend, ran around the city with a relative yesterday, and worked hard today. I’m exhausted. Dealing with a group of body conscious pretty boys is the last think I feel like doing tonight. My idea of the perfect fuck right now is a sub who gives up his hole, gets me to blow my load, and then slowly pampers me and gets me to relax. You guys are too high maintenance.

I understand the whole muscle worship thing and know some guys will do anything to get with someone like you. I’m not one of them. In my experience average guys are often better fucks. When everything else is equal I prefer a lean to muscular bottom, but there are a lot of factors that are more important to me than the guy’s body. It’s those other factors that make me not want to hookup with you.

The e-mail was returned saying the e-mail address didn’t exist. I tried his other e-mail address – same thing. He had deleted both of his e-mail addresses. Only total fakers use throw-away e-mail addresses – I’m sure he never intended to hookup with me…

So, after having out of town pretty boys fuck with me twice lately, next time I’m requiring a video chat. I’m also thinking I’ll verify their location by making them hit a page that tells me their IP address and then I’ll look it up on the services that say where IP addresses are located. Otherwise they can contact me when they get in town and give me a hotel address and get a quick anonymous fuck like everyone else…