Load 2012-2

Yeah, I know the N word in the title has probably got some of you guys wondering WTF? but you’ll understand in a bit…

There’s a black guy I’ve been fucking on an off for a while now. He’s got a nice body, his hole always feels good on my cock so I always cum with him. I wouldn’t call it A+ sex, but it’s good enough to make him a regular. 🙂

Last time he started getting into poz talk while I was fucking him (inaccurately assuming I was poz). Since then I had asked him once if he got into race play and being called nigger. He said he hadn’t done it in the past – just had other black guys call him nigga. I sorta backtracked on the question pretty quickly ’cause when I started thinking about it, he’s not all that submissive, and I couldn’t imagine calling someone nigger unless they were being submissive.

Friday he was on A4A when I was looking. It’s been difficult lately to find guys who will travel up to Washington Heights in the middle of the day (when I’m  typically available). He was, so I told him to come up.

When he came in we stripped down (I kept on my shirt), and while he was sucking my dick I reached over and fingered his hole. It felt a bit lubed. When I rimmed him it tasted pretty good – a tad musky, but good. He LOVED being rimmed, but I wanted to fuck, so I lubed up and shoved in. I tried to push him down on his belly, but he resisted – he clearly wanted to get fucked doggy style (as I said, he’s not submissive).

As I fucked him I kept hitting something in his ass that felt like a hard turd. I didn’t investigate ’cause I knew as soon as I saw shit it would be over. It was weird though – I knew he had cleaned out – so it didn’t make sense, but it felt a bit pointy and hard. Who knows… Never did figure it out…

Then he starts saying stuff like “yeah, fuck that nigger ass”. From that point on it was a constant stream of comments and he used the word “nigger” every time. It was a weird dynamic. I wasn’t calling him nigger, he was calling himself nigger. I’m not being good at being verbal. When I fuck I’m thinking concepts, not sentences. If I actually say what I’m thinking it sounds stupid ’cause I typically string the concepts in my head together with the wrong verbs/adjectives, or I repeat the same concept over and over in my head – which would sound boring and repetitive if I said it out loud.

So I just concentrated on fucking him, but I gotta say having a bottom call himself a “nigger whore”, etc. while I was fucking him was a huge turn on. It’s hard to describe, but it made me harder and I came really quickly as soon as he started being verbal. Usually I hate when guys are verbal – but apparently I’ve found an exception…

After I came, he sorta insisted I tweak his nipples while he jack off. I hate that – it’s sorta the reason why he’s not A+ sex. When I’ve cum, I just want down time. Plus, I don’t really like nipple play – it’s not my thing. And honestly, I don’t give a shit if the bottom cums – I’m fine if I never see their dick.

As he was dressing he said he had done a pump-n-dump with another fuckbud on the way over to my place – which explains why his ass seemed lubed. To bad I didn’t taste the load when I was rimming him.

The guy who works for me was in the other room when all of this was happening. I had wondered whether I should offer the black guy’s ass to him. I know the black guy would have gladly taken the guy’s load, but the power dynamics were all off. I wasn’t really in charge – and that sorta sums up why I don’t fuck him more often… He’s a regular, but an infrequent regular. And it also explains why the use of the word nigger wasn’t a big deal – given the power dynamic the word didn’t mean much of anything. Though I guess there could be something going on in his head – willingly calling yourself a “nigger hole” to get a load from a white guy might eventually make you see yourself as a nigger. Who knows…