Join Me In Telling Researchers About Our Sex Lives

3 August 2008 | 5 Comments

I’ve been sitting on this for a while now ’cause I’ve been busy with work and lately ’cause I figured I needed to be giving you guys more sex and less “stuff”… So since you got write-ups on no fewer than three hookups in the past 4 days, I figured it was time for me to take care of this…

A few months ago I told you about a research study about drugs and sex that was being done by CHEST which is part of Hunter College here in NYC. Well, the folks behind that study are starting a new study called “Pillow Talk” where sexually active guys login and record their sexual activity before they go to bed each night. Here’s their full blurb on the study…

The Study is called Pillow Talk. It is for sexually active NYC gay and bisexual men. We are really interested in learning about men’s sexual experiences. There are absolutely no judgments and this is not an intervention (i.e., we are not trying to change any behavior). We just want to hear your story!

Men who join the study will be asked to visit our office in Chelsea, where they will participate in a 1-on-1 confidential interview and a computer-based survey. Something new we have added to the study is a “daily diary.” Men who join the study will complete a brief online-survey about their day. They will keep this “diary” for 30 days.

There are 2 follow up appointments. We ask you to return 1-month and 4-months after joining the study. This is to get an update on you life since the last time we saw you. All told, you can earn up to $220 for full participation.

Call 212-206-7919 x 300 to screen for the study. All calls are completely confidential.

Or email (we can answer questions briefly via email, but will ultimately ask you to call if you want to screen for the study).

This study is being sponsored by Hunter College. We have been doing research with the GLBT community for more than a decade.

You may be asking “why bother”? To me there are two really good reasons. First, the $220 isn’t bad, but more importantly it’s important that researchers understand what’s going on in our lives. Honestly, the safe sex message is failing miserably these days. Personally I don’t think that’s going to change, but I feel like we need to give “thinkers” the information they need to come up with something better than “use a condom every time”. They need to understand the lives of those of us who are sexually active in order to really understand what messages have a possibility of working.

I will always encourage guys to ditch the rubbers, fucked raw, and give and take loads. But at the same time I have no problem helping the safe sex crowd get their act together and get more grounded in reality.

If you contact them, please tell them you heard about the study from rawTOP. If you don’t want to admit to reading this blog you can say your friend “Richard” told you about the study (Richard = Dick => I’m a top… Get it?)

And just for the record – I do plan on signing up for this study. It wasn’t until today when I looked closely at the study objectives and requirements that I realized I was eligible…


So I called a couple of days ago to inquire. They said they had about 10 minutes of questions (it took 13 minutes), and I was approved. Apparently the 30-odd guys I’ve fucked in the last 3 months qualifies me as being a big enough slut for their study… I have an appointment early next week.

I’m not quite sure why the appointment is going to take 3 hours, but that’s how long they say it will be. It’ll be interesting to see what they do with me for 3 hours! No wonder they pay you $225 to be part of the study…


I went in today for the initial interview it took 3 hours like they said it would. They first went over the different sex, alcohol and drug use I had had in the past 90 days (looks like I had sex with over 50 guys thanks to IML and going to the bathhouse in Montreal). Then we had a general discussion of sex, and then there was an hour long computer survey. So pretty straightforward, and they paid $40 for the three hours.

Now for the next 30 days I do a daily online survey (get paid $40 if I complete all 30 days), then there’s a 4(!) hour follow up interview for which I get paid $45, and then another interview something like a month after that (another $40 I think…)

The important part is that the people there really are really non-judgemental. It was a woman (young) who interviewed me. I could tell she’d heard it all before and had no problem with my answers (and I was reall pretty honest and frank with her)… So I can say from personal experience that you won’t have a negative experience if you go…