Levi Johnston Pics Are Out – Not So Sexy, IMHO…
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21 November 2009 | 5 Comments
So Playgirl’s photos of Levi Johnston came out today (that was quick). Frankly, I think the photographer did a horrible job, but maybe that’s just me. He looks awkward. Why in the hell did they shoot him in NYC for anyway? Wouldn’t a nice rural resort in Alaska have been better? He looks awkward and uncomfortable in some of the pics. As they say, confidence is sexy, and he doesn’t look confident – and his not showing his wang just furthers that point – confident guys have no problem with other people seeing their dick.
Then there’s his ass… I’d fuck it, but honestly, I was expecting better.
If you get off thinking about fucking Sarah Palin’s sorta-son-in-law, then these will seem hot to you. But otherwise, I’d stick with something like Frat Men – the guys there are what he should look like if he’s going to do porn for real. But he is an average Joe, so he’s excused for not being in perfect shape on short notice.
I’m hoping he’ll get inspired to do more. After all, I’d love Sarah Palin to have to explain to her grand kid why daddy is doing gay porn…
If you want to see the whole shoot – head over to Playgirl.com.
Like Sexy Straight Guys? Check Out Playgirl.com
18 U.S.C 2257 Record-Keeping Requirements Compliance Statement
Yeah, these are boring. If you’re not going to show dick, what is the point?
I’m a gay bodybuilder and personal trainer with my own gym, and I’m also a big fan of Levi Johnston (and anybody else who serves to put a damper on his almost mother-in-law’s boundless political ambitions, God help all of us US Americans). So I can say with authority, as both a builder and admirer of muscle:
1) Levi: fire your trainer, and come train with me for a month!
2) Better still, Levi, fire your trainer, and come train with me for 3 months.
3) Have the photographer deported. God almighty, this boy is painfully handsome (and anybody who’s seen all his photos in Vanity Fair will attest to that); how the hell did the lens man manage to shoot him looking like somebody caught with the preacher’s daughter, anxious to get out of the frame and high tailed down the road?
4)Levi: Fuck the naysayers. You’re young and ur bod will burst out with bigger and more beautiful muscles as you mature a bit. You’re a hot young guy who hasn’t come into his own yet.
5) Your mug is way handsome. It might be a smart move not showing the Johnston johnson. Get yourself some big name modeling gigs. Work it. Get a good agent. Make some big/bigger money. And above all, continue to do all you can to protect us US Americans from the Wrath Of Sarah. God almighty, if she makes it to Pennsylvania Avenue, I’m moving to Australia…
6) Finally: fire your trainer.
Sadly for Levi he just does not have the time. By the time he’s “cum into his own” he’ll be old news; in fact his 15 minutes may already be up (I hear Playgirl lost a lot of money on the shoot, because few people are forking over $20 for this “special issue.”) Further, from what I’ve seen and heard of the boy, he’s probably not savvy enough to make it in porn. Two months from now I see him back in Alaska, driving a truck and selling tina on the side with his mom.
From what I read, he only trained for a month to a month and a half. Given what his body looked like before, I’d say it’s not all that bad. 90% of the adult male population would kill for his body. I’d do him in a second.
I read somewhere he was going to eat 5000 calories, mostly of moose meat. This is ridiculous. Body building rarely burns several thousand calories a day, so if it was true he was on a 5000 calorie diet, his trainer should indeed be fired. The photographer doesn’t look so hot either.