Load 2008-43

Well, last night I went to the gangbang I told you guys about the other day… It was really pretty hot…

I had had a busy day and was a little tired when I got home. I really wanted to rest for a little bit before going to the gangbang. But it was around 9pm and the top who was organizing it said the bottom had been taking loads since 5pm, had 13 loads in him, and was starting to wear out, so I took a quick shower and left…

When I got there the metal security bar (the one that replaces the chain they used to have on hotel doors) was blocking the door – keeping it ajar… I open the door and it’s pitch black inside. The only light is coming from a laptop on the desk. I’ve got big pupils and can see pretty well in the dark, but I was having trouble seeing clearly… There was no way the top could really check out what the guys fucking the bottom were like. A general idea, sure, but there was no way he was seeing them all that clearly… This was a definite anonymous breeding session…

The bottom had a thin fabric blindfold on. His body was hot as shit (you could see shapes in the darkness – though I never did see his face clearly)… There was another top laying on the bed with the bottom, feeling up his hole and his body. I saw the young top who was coordinating the gangbang and he told me he now had 16 loads in him that the top who was on the bed and me would be loads 17 and 18… He also told me that he had already given the bottom two of his own loads and the other top that was there had given him one earlier in the evening…

The bottom was really pretty incredible. He had a perfect, lean, defined, post-twink body. He was shorter than me (which I like), and his ass was simply amazing… The perfect perky ass…

Since the other top wasn’t really doing much, I got on the bed, spread the bottom’s ass and started rimming him. How is it that bottoms with loads in them don’t taste like cum when you rim them? I don’t get that… He had 16 loads in him, but I didn’t taste anything even when I was sucking on his ass. He just had a squeaky clean ass – no real taste at all…

Oh well, that didn’t stop me from wanting to fuck him. I got his hole nice and wet with spit and shoved in… [BTW, thanks to the flash, you actually see more in the pics than I was able to see in the dark – even after my eyes adjusted.]

Pushing in his hole seemed a bit dry, but as soon as I was in I could tell he had loads in him. His ass was really silky… Cum really is the best lube!

The other top that was on the bed just sorta laid there and watched. It was so dark he didn’t really disturb me (you can see his leg in the pic above). The bottom’s hole just felt so good…

Needless to say, it didn’t take me long to cum. I hadn’t cum in a few days and had a nice big load built up. After I came I rimmed him some more. This time I tasted a little cum.

Afterwards the other top started playing with him again, and I talked for a bit with the hosting top. Then another guy came in the room. This one seemed pretty young and was pretty hot himself. He stripped down naked (great body) and went over to the bed where the other top stepped aside to let him breed the bottom. The hosting top and the other top were sorta feeling the action. Frankly, I wanted to fuck the new young top… He had an awesome ass and there were times he was on all fours with his ass near the edge of the bed. But I hate being disturbed when I’m fucking a bottom, so didn’t want to bother him…

The two of them fucked in all sorts of positions – he had him on his belly, legs up, in a spooning sort of position, it kept changing over and over. The top had great stamina and the fucking went on and on. At one point I noticed the top was whispering stuff in the bottom’s ear. I wanted to hear what he was saying so I went over to that side of the bed. Still couldn’t hear much of what was being said but I did hear him tell the bottom “I’m gonna breed you…” Whatever he was saying it was turning the bottom on.

Finally the young top did cum (load 18), got dressed, chatted a bit with the host, and then left. It wasn’t until he was over by the computer that I could sorta see his face clearly. He really was cute – but it was so dark in there I’m sure plenty of tops came and went without anyone really seeing them clearly.

The other top finally started fucking the bottom and appeared to cum (load 19). Then I took another turn fucking the bottom. For some reason his hole didn’t feel as good this time – not that it was bad in any way, just not quite as good. I pounded him a while and then realized I wasn’t going to be able to cum, so I pulled out.

I needed to go meet my boyfriend who was out with friends, so after a few words with the hosting top I left…

I believe the young top who hosted it when he says the gangbang was about a neg bottom taking neg loads. But it was certainly set up in a way that facilitated a completely different type of scene, and not all the tops with accepted party invites on BarebackRT said they were neg – one said he was “undectectable” another one said “ask me”. Not knowing the bottom I can’t really say what his intentions were – other than to get lots of cum in his ass.

And he did get a lot of cum in his ass – 20 loads from 15 tops.

So you do the math and figure out for yourself what that gangbang was about and it’s implications… There’s a lot of ways to read what happened…

The top really gets into organizing gangbangs. If you’re neg and serious about wanting a similar scene – send him an e-mail – btownguy20@yahoo.com…

UPDATE: I knew I’d seen the bottom’s pics online before… Found his profiles on BarebackRT, Manhunt and Adam4Adam. On BarebackRT you can specify your status and the status of the guys you want to hookup with. He said he was “Negative” and said “No Preference” for the guys who fuck him. I think the second part says volumes…

Anyway, we exchanged a few e-mails – sounds like he’d be up for it again, but wants a top to host/organize… If any of you are interested let me know…

And if you bred him that night – let me know… Would be interesting to hear more about that night…

This is just too much…

hi there

i pop onto your site here and there every blue moon –

i was in a relationship for 13 years, so i barebacked with my partner at the time, never goin eleswhere for fear of disease and plus i loved my partner…and only wanted to be with my parter.

in reading your blog in more depth – i am disgusted at your actions – gay people like yourself, are the ones who give us moralistic fags a bad name. “they” all think we are like you, and we are not all like you….

you have a boyfriend whom you love? you couldnt possibly… you only love yourself – how could you put yourself, as well as others at risk with HIV/AIDS as well as countless other stds? these random hook ups to dump your load into as many asses as u can, until u get some disease, is horrid. people like you should be locked away or castrated. you will fuck all kinds before you realise or get notifed that you have AIDS and at the same time infect all these other people who are just as retarded as u….sick like u…

either your boyfriend is a fool cuz you dont seem like a brad pitt kinda lookin guy, so im not sure what or why he stays with you…how could u love someone or be with someone and are constantly goin out to fuck someone else… bareback at that..im all for bareback in a relationship… after testing etc…

you are only shortening your time when you get AIDS and you will at some point.. your parents should be horrified that this is what they raise… prepare your mum for an AIDS death/funeral… this bullshit that if you top u cant get or vice versa is just that… bullshit – when people like u come down with the diseases that is iminent… it is well deserved – when people like u catch these deadly diseases, it is warranted and i have no pity – rather laugh at the stupidity…

im waiting for the day, and you will… where you write, “i have contracted AIDS” i will post a huge LOL.. on your page and tell u that you deserve it… you are a disgrace to fags and to the human race –

RIP

What do you say to someone like that? I’ll give it a quick shot…

Today is gay day. The point of gay day is to say you don’t care what straights think – that you’re proud of who you are and believe that others in your community should be accepted just as they are. The opinions of straight people (including my mother) are not how I determine my self worth.

There is no need to live up to heterosexual values or morals. There’s nothing wrong with examining them and learning from them, but that should be the limit. Hell, even the straight community has “swingers”. They’re really no different than those of us in the gay community who enjoy sex with random people.

The other parts of what he says are just so far out there there’s really nothing that can be said about them. He’s so far from the truth it’s just not funny.

Load 2008-44

I did go to the gangbang last night. I’ve started the write up on it, but I’m waiting for pics of me fucking the bottom from the top who organized it…

This morning I was still horny. I was a little worried about how a hookup would go ’cause I hadn’t eaten much of anything, and hadn’t taken any pills or anything (except last night)… But when I was looking at pics on Manhunt I had a rock hard cock, so I knew things should at least be able to work for fucking – even if I couldn’t cum…

There were a few options, but this one hot light-skinned black guy couldn’t commit to hooking up, and other guys were too far away (subway is running via shuttle buses again this weekend). Then the Brazilian guy who lives near me contacted me and said “Fuck Me”. It was quick, easy and local – so I had him come over…

It was a pretty basic hookup with him… He sucked my cock, I fucked him, came in his ass, we cuddled, and he left… Pretty much like a lot of the other times we hooked up. The only thing that was different was that I nearly came when I had his legs up – that almost never happens – usually I can only cum with him on his belly. The other notable thing was that I was able to come 12 hours after I last came – that something that’s usually pretty hard for me…

So it was a good hookup. Got me over my horniness…

The CDC released a report the other day about HIV infection among men who have sex with men (MSM). It covered the period 2001 to 2006 and used data from 33 states. Here’s the graph showing the trends among guys ages 13-24…

There are a number of things that are striking about the report…

First is the obvious trend with young black guys 13-24 shown in the graph above. That graph is of actual diagnoses, so think about what it means for that many black “kids” to be getting infected. Blacks are approximately 12% of the population nationwide, but they were 56% of the guys getting infected with HIV between 2001 and 2006 – in 2006 that went up to 59%. To be fair the 12% is the national average and the infection data is for 33 states, but still… Every year the rate of infection for young black guys goes up about 15%.

Next is the trend that’s sort of gets lost in the graph – and that is the rate of increase for young Asian guys 13-24 – it’s going up about 31% a year. Because of small sample size with Asians the number could actually be anywhere from 12% to 53% (95% confidence) – but that’s a huge shift… It used to be that Asian guys were always pretty conservative sexually, but that’s changing quickly and young Asian guys are having more and more risky sex.

Other trends in the full report were that the rate of infection is actually going down for some groups – It’s going down about 4% a year for guys in New York and New Jersey. It’s going down about 1% a year for guys ages 25-44 but that group comprises 64% of the new HIV infections. And the geographic regions with the highest rates of increase are the West and Midwest – about 7% a year increase…

So all in all there’s nothing really surprising in this report. Infection rates are down for older guys and up for younger guys, which we’ve seen reported before.

And the explanation is pretty simple. Young guys don’t have a memory of what it was like back when HIV was a death sentence. Their actions reflect what they see – that AIDS deaths are at an all-time low.

The other thing to remember is that the report can be affected by local pushes to increase HIV testing. For example I expect to see a spike in rates for Blacks and Hispanics because NYC is doing a big push to get everyone living in the Bronx tested for HIV (that one Borough accounts for 1/3rd of the AIDS deaths in the NYC even though it’s just 19% of the population).

However local pushes only have so much influence on the numbers. We’re still seeing a remarkable increase in infections among young Blacks and Asians. Even for young Hispanics who have the lowest increase for people in their age cohort – it’s still going up 8% a year.

Now compare that to the fact that young guys are more likely to use condoms (at least in NYC). That’s one statistic I think will be changing as more and more of them are apparently learning to enjoy barebacking…

Here’s another gangbang for those of you who are tops in NYC… It’s being organized by the young top I tagged the bottom with the other day…

BB Dump and GO on Saturday… We will begin around 5pm and go until…?

Door will be open. Cum in, fuck raw, dump your load and go. Have a buddy? Send his pics if you can.

We will be doing this at Hotel Pennsylvania… Right behind Madison Square Garden and Penn Station.

No hangin around, chillin, etc. Dump and go. Stay if you can dump a second load in a short time span, otherwise come back later. 🙂

FYI: bttm is 27, 5’9, 135 with a 29″w and will be blindfolded.

Some pics may be taken of cock and ass only – no faces. if you don’t want that, no problem… just let me know.

Finally, the room was expensive for broke-ass college students like us – so if you wouldn’t mind giving me (the host) some cash toward the room when you arrive, that would be great! Not required, but MUCH appreciated!

I’ll send out the room number when we check in Saturday. We are 100% for real. Let me know if you can make it!

The other thing to know is that they’re looking for neg tops. So keep that in mind when contacting them… However, in the party ad they have on BarebackRT there are tops coming who list their HIV status as “undetectable”. The latest Craigslist ad they put up doesn’t mention the bottom is neg or that they’re looking for neg tops, though an earlier ad did mention it – so take that requirement as you will. My take on it is that they’re fully aware of the risk the bottom’s taking and they gotta know the bottom is taking poz loads…

After missing the gangbang last week that went so well (from organizer’s perspective, from bottom’s perspective), I’m going to try really hard to make it to this one. A hot neg bottom blindfolded on a bed taking anonymous load after anonymous load is too good to miss two times in a row… I know I’ve got something going on that night, but hopefully I can over to the hotel after it ends…

So all you NYC tops and versatile guys who like to breed hot bottoms – let’s make sure he gets tons of hot cum in that ass of his… And seriously – take your friends along and tell other breeder tops about it…

You can contact the top who’s organizing it at btownguy20@yahoo.com

[All the pics in the post are of the bottom – I’ve seen his face pics – he’s hot…]

Today is “National HIV Testing Day”, so I’ll give my pitch on HIV testing – which won’t be quite what you hear from others…

For the most part, the people who die of AIDS these days are people who don’t get tested and don’t find out they’re poz until it’s too late for treatments to be effective. There’s no need for those deaths… None whatsoever.

If you’re worried what it will mean to test positive – give up that fear and go get tested. Becoming HIV positive today is not the death sentence it once was. In fact, there’s a good chance you’ll die of something else – like old age or in a car accident or something. But that’s not the case if you don’t get tested. Then the chances are you will die of AIDS.

In other words – don’t be afraid of HIV, be afraid of not knowing your poz.

You don’t have to get tested every 3 or 6 months unless you want to. The goal here is to catch your HIV before it starts doing really nasty shit to your body. You’re probably fine if you catch it within a year of infection – but definitely don’t wait more than 2 years between tests. There are strains of HIV that are more aggressive than others that need to be treated fairly quickly.

If it’s been more than a year since you had an HIV test, get tested this week…

Last night when I was laying on the floor playing with my dog I noticed a book on my shelf – “Epitaphs for the Living“. It was published in 1989 and I bought it shortly after I came out. It’s an incredibly somber book. Has pictures of people with AIDS with their hand written notes below the picture. I want to quote from some of them…

There’s a picture of two guys sitting on a bed. One has his arm around the other… Each gave their perspective, but one is especially poignant…

Life is such a precious gift! It has been very hard to watch life melt away from the one I love and I can do nothing but be there and love him with all my heart. I love you Pat.

Another picture is of a guy in a turtle neck most guys would say was pretty hot…

Thank you, Billy, for a beautiful photograph. Its how I want to be remembered; happy, attractive, self satisifid and content with lie. But in many ways the photo doesn’t look like me. · It doesn’t show the K.S. lesions growing on my face + body. · It doesn’t show that I am half blind · It doesn’t show the fact that I’ve had 3 bouts of Pneumocystis Pneumonia in the past year and a half · It doesn’t show the fear I have of what may happen to my health either tomorrow or 6 months down the road · It doesn’t show the sadness, not only my own, but the sadness I feel every time I walk down the street and see friends and acquaintances who have been diagnosed. · It doesn’t show the anger I feel at having about 1/2 of my life whipped out from under my feet at the age of 30. · It doesn’t show the great discontent and anger I have form our government for having ignored this epidemic for so long while people were dying in every city in our country. · It doesn’t show the great amount of love + compassion I feel from my family, community + friends. · And most of all it doesn’t show the tremendous need for all sexually active people to learn about AIDS to protect themselves and their loved ones so the y won’t have to go through my pain or the pain of so many others who have gone before me and will continue to go after me.

David Brewster
San Francisco, CA
Diagnosed Oct 31, 1986

Then there’s a photo of a guy sitting in a barber’s chair in what looks like the middle of a living room or sun porch. He looks about 40…

Sometimes I find myself siting all alone wondering, after two years since diagnosis, where I will find the strength to continue to live with AIDS. I think living with AIDS can be the hardest part, not the dieing [sic].

Johnnie

Then there’s a picture of a black man looking out a window at a hospital. He’s wearing a denim jacket and glasses…

Being tested HIV positive has not been easy. You can’t really set any goals, except to thank God for letting you see the breaking of a new day, a day that none of us have ever seen before. I take one day at a time and hope for the next day…

Jim

Then there’s a picture of a very weak looking guy named Dave in a hospital bed. His friend/lover is at the end of the room looking out the window…

I just wanted to say how scared I was, I’m so sick of being sick I can’t stand it. The cancer on my skin has gotten so bad I’m afraid to be seen in public. I thank God for the support of all my friends especially Ernie and Michael and to know that they are there. It’s just sometimes for me it’s hard. Its hard being the one that’s always smiling and saying everything is okay. Sometimes I feel like its not okay. After working all the years I’ve worked I finally made a name for myself. It’s all taken away. I don’t want to have to settle for that. People say you should be happy to be alive. This to me is not living. But I’ll be okay. I’ll go to sleep and wake up tomorrow and everything will be fine again.

When I found I had AIDS it didn’t bother me as far as knowing I was going to die. Dieing doesn’t scare me, but leaving my friends did. I was always afraid of what was going to happen. I guess I was still scared…

Dave died before the book was published. His friends transcribed his words from audio cassette.

Which reminds me, one of the things I wish I had done before my lover died was to record his voice. I’ve forgotten what his voice sounded like…

Damn… I’m sitting here barely able to see the screen through my tears. All of you guys who think I don’t remember what it was like – that I’m somehow spitting on the graves of those who died – fuck you. I do remember. It’s just things are very different now. Very very different.

That was a time of death. Now we’re in a time of living. A lot of people who went through that are still very angry and their fears about things like HIV are very deep seated. I get that – this post has been really difficult to write because I went through it too.

While things have changed, if you don’t get tested your experience will be like the guys above rather than the healthy poz guys you see around you living normal lives.

Please get tested… Know your HIV status so you can live a long healthy life…