I’ve never been big on phone sex. When guys ask for my number I’m really clear the only reason they should call me is ’cause they’re lost and can’t find my place, or they’re running late, or something like that. I don’t want to chat. I want to fuck.

So I saw this video mentioned over on Joe. My. God. and thought it was too funny…

Middle of this week I felt an itchiness “down there”, Thursday I saw discharge… UGH! Here we go again. It was less than 6 weeks ago that I went through this. I really don’t need this again, but what do you do? I guess in a way I should be happy that I’ve got visible symptoms and can get it cleared up quickly.

The timing was too perfect – I’m 90% sure I got it from the guy the townhouse guy had me fuck. I also told the 20-year old I fucked briefly about it, but I doubt it was him, or any of the other guys before him. It’s theoretically possible, but far more likely it was the first guy.

So, having been busy with work, I wasn’t able to get to Callen-Lorde to get things cleared up until this weekend. I noticed on their website that it talked about a Saturday morning walk-in STD clinic, so I figured I’d give that a shot. Having been to the free clinic the City runs, I was prepared and got there early – absurdly early. I was the first one there. And I waited and waited. When they officially started seeing patients an hour later it was just me and one other guy waiting to be seen. There must be times when it’s busy, but today wasn’t one of them.

There are a lot of good things about Callen-Lorde, but today was one of my best experiences ever. The staff was in a super happy mood. There was zero hassle – they asked what the problem was, and gave the fix with zero judgments (unlike the last time)…

So, I’d highly recommend trying out the Saturday clinic if you’re in need of their services or just want to get checked out…

One weird thing though… Later in the day I saw two of the guys who work at Callen-Lorde walking down the street. Didn’t think anything of it ’cause it was right near Callen-Lorde. Then a few hours later we’re in line at Uniqlo buying t-shirts (another recommended spot), and who’s behind us in line? The two guys from Callen-Lorde, plus another friend. Weird coincidence, eh?

And speaking of STDs and coincidences, right after I picked up my pills at the pharmacy I got an e-mail from the big dicked top who was at the gangbang telling me one of his fuck buddies tested positive for syph, he was being proactive and warning the guys he’d had sex with. Personally, I think that was a bit of overkill. There’s no saying he had syph… Personally I would have gotten myself tested before notifying people I’d had sex with… But he was being really responsible about it (he even contacted the bottom before contacting me)… I give him great marks for being upfront about it…

And as always guys… If you’re fucking around a bunch – get tested for STDs regularly and treat things quickly. If you find you have something, let your partners know. If they have a problem with you telling them – they’re idiots… Stopping the spread of STDs makes everyone’s sex lives better!

Last night I was out with my bf and a friend at the Eagle. We were up on the roof deck and at one point I saw a black woman walking around with a white guy. She was pointing at things, including something in our corner of the roof, above our heads…

When she turned she had some writing on her jacket, and the white guy had NYPD on his jacket. Thought that was weird – they must be doing some sort of inspection, but why did she feel the need to have a police escort? I mean, what did she think was going to happen to her in a gay bar? But the funniest part was how much they blended into the crowd. I mean police and fire shirts and uniforms are pretty standard at the Eagle…

Then a few minutes later I see guys in FDNY shirts/jackets. Again, they just sorta blended into the crowd. Then the woman and the white guy showed up again. This time she stayed longer and I saw her jacket said DOHMH (Department of Health And Mental Hygiene). She went behind the bar and the bartender tried his best to answer her questions while her police escort waited in the wings. Ironically the bartender was wearing an NYPD t-shirt.

We were wiped and so we left a few minutes after they left the roof deck. On the second floor we saw what looked like a captain of some sort (white shirt) talking to what looked like the manager. There are more of them by the coat check and when we get outside there’s a gaggle of about 8 of them from different departments. One of them was walking just in front of us and one of the others asked him something like “So, what did you think? Was it what you were expecting?”

The whole thing just struck me as funny. I mean, what in the hell did they expect to find in a leather bar but a bunch of gay guys? If anything, with all the NYPD and FDNY t-shirts, they should have felt right at home…

Hopefully whatever violations they put against the Eagle were as anti-climatic as the raid itself. I mean, the whole thing seemed pretty silly.

I worry about the Eagle though… It never seems as full as it should be. We went to The Gym late this afternoon. It always seems busy. (I even over heard two gay guys discussing sports scores and player histories!) It’s a much smaller bar, so it doesn’t take many people to make it seem busy, but we’ve been to the Eagle a few times lately when it just seems dead. That’s not a good thing. Sure, there are a few hours every week when it’s packed, but you need more than that to keep a business profitable… I’d hate to see the only leather(ish) bar that we’ve got have problems.

And last time we were there we were talking to one of the guys from The Leatherman and they’re worried about the lease at their Christopher Street store. It’s coming up for renewal this year… That could be bad news for the leather/fetish community as well.

Then today we walked past the building where the Spike used to be. It’s all boarded up and it looks so run down it seems like it might be condemned or something. What’s the point of that? I know the neighborhood where the leather bars used to be is all upscale now, but how is no income and the place in horrible shape better than a leather bar that pays rent? I don’t know the story behind the closing of the Spike, but I just hope that if the landlord was a prick, he’s learned his lesson by now…

The raid last night just shows how the City is all scared of the leather community. I’m sure they were expecting to see wonton sex all over the place, but instead they just saw gay guys standing around and drinking beer in NYPD and FDNY shirts…

Why in the hell did they feel the need for over a dozen people do do an inspection of a gay bar? Complete with police escorts? And I can’t imagine they found much of anything – certainly nothing they couldn’t have found by doing the inspection in the middle of the day…

Sometimes I just wonder what’s going on with this City…

I’ve been working like a dog lately, but it’s all good… The folks behind Bareback That Hole asked me to manage the blogs they were starting for each of their pay sites.

There was a fair amount of work to get the blog templates in shape so the company’s affiliates are properly credited for all the sales from people they sent to the blogs. I also had to make sure that search engine spiders understood the site and didn’t get confused by the fact that every affiliate was linking to things with a different URL. (Problems like that are called “duplicate content” and can kill a site in the eyes of a search engine).

Then I had to go through 60 to 70 existing blog posts and edit the wording of the posts since quite a few of them were written by someone for whom English is a second language. Writing and fleshing out posts on condom sex and stripteases was a bit of a stretch for me. The bareback stuff was pretty fun, but what do you say about a guy jacking off on a white couch, when you just edited a post about the same guy jacking off on a different white couch and another one of him jacking off on a white chair? I mean there are guys are into that stuff, but it’s not really my thing… Even so, I was surprised how much I could say about the guy jacking off…

I’m pretty excited about the project. I gives me the opportunity to play with different types of sites and see how I can get them to perform. And if I get backed into a corner sometime and some says “you work on gay porn sites?” I can tell them I work on a latin stripper site if I don’t want to tell them about this site…

So here’s a rundown of the sites…

So there you have it… What I’ve been working on in the past week. And there’s still a lot more behind-the-scenes stuff to go, plus keeping up with the new posts as they come out (3x a month)… And they’re launching a new Felching site that’s going to be a blast to work on!

Don’t worry – this site will always be my true love. I’m not going to get distracted and stop updating it or anything.

If you happen to run gay porn sites and you’re looking for someone to SEO them, feel free to contact me… I’m not really looking for anything right away – sorta want to see how these sites go. But if the right project came along I might pick it up.

BareDerek checked out the cumhole from Detroit that I have listed in my directory of available, easy, bareback bottoms (see the pic to the right)…

Well, he googled the name in the e-mail address, hubscher313, and he found all sorts of interesting information…

• He’s “Looking for attractive single guys who know Christ.”
• He reiterates that again on a gay Christian site: “I’m trying to build my own relationship with Christ, and as a gay guy, am finding that somewhat difficult. Would love to meet a good looking christian guy to spend some time with.”
• But then on other sites he reiterates at least part of what he said to me – that he likes to PNP… On one site he’s got one profile that says he’s versatile – and another that says he’s a top, both say he wants to PNP.

If you’re like me and had a Bible thumper upbringing guys like this are all too familiar… They’re the ones who get up in church and tell the heart wrenching story about their struggle with _____(you fill in the blank)____, and how Jesus Christ made all the difference, and how they couldn’t have done it without him…

To me it’s just sad… I can just imagine what he’s going through. When he’s sober he tries to be good, but ultimately he’s not being true to himself and he needs more than that. So he does meth which lets his inner pig out so he can be the total cumhole he really wants to be. He says he “prefers” tops to be neg, but it’s clear that when he’s high his inhibitions go out the window…

Let me make a prediction… When he finally figures out he’s poz, he’ll go through depression and/or anger, when he gets over that he’s eventually going to learn to enjoy being a poz pig and realize it’s just part of who he is. Gradually he’ll stop feeling guilty about his desires and will be able to be a cumhole without the help of his “friend”, Tina… That’s when his life is finally going to make sense and he’ll be able to get on track and take control of his life and make something of himself…

Guys – stop torturing yourself! Accept yourself for who you are. Accept that there are things about yourself you just can’t change. Yes, you have free will and you can transform yourself. But sometimes you just need to accept that you may be something you don’t want to be. Whether that means you accept that you’re gay, or whether that means that come to terms with the fact that you’re hard wired to be a pig and will probably end up poz. It’s different for each person, but you just gotta accept yourself. The sooner you do, the sooner you can get on with life.

If you’re doing drugs to release your inner pig, and then beat yourself up about it later (go to bible study, whatever), then you’ve got a serious issue. Just accept yourself. You can either go through the downward spiral, have no job, no apartment, no self-control, and no teeth when you’re done, and then have to build yourself up from zero. Or you can start from where you are, accept yourself, and work up from there.

I know drugs are chemically addictive and you’re going to need professional help to get them under control. But (speaking out of my ass, ’cause I’ve never had a drug addiction issue), I honestly think accepting yourself and learning to love yourself are one of the keys to inching your way up rather than spiraling down…

I’m actually working something out with a drugs and barebacking research study here in NY and you’ll start seeing ads for their study on the site (more about that next week). But for a segment of the gay community (many of whom read blogs like this), this is a big issue.

Ultimately, I’m not the best person to look to for advice on this stuff, but the issue’s out there and it needs to be dealt with… It just kills me to see guys like this bouncing between the two extremes of a church-goer one weekend and a bug chasing cumhole fucked up on meth the next weekend…

It’s not an either or proposition. There’s a middle ground where you’re a well-rounded person who can be a slutty bottom and still have a great life surrounded by supportive things like friends and boyfriends… [sfverscumboy‘s posts this week about hunting for cum, meeting up with his bf, and hunting for more cum spring to mind…]

Load 2008-26

This past week (or two) has felt pretty sparse sexually. Too often I just haven’t felt in the mood to fuck – mostly ’cause I’ve been busy with work. I even worked all weekend on a project I’ll tell you about in a couple days…

Saturday morning the guy who has the nice townhouse contacted me on BarebackRT and asked if I wanted to come over. I sorta felt like it, but Saturdays are weird for me. I tend to wake up with a hardon, but then lose my sex drive a few hours later. So I put him off… But Sunday evening (yesterday), I really just needed to at least try to cum. He was online, so I contacted him again. He said he had a bottom coming over and asked if I wanted to fuck the bottom with him. I said sure so he told me to head over. The weird part was I didn’t know who the bottom was when I actually left the apartment. I was just trusting that he’d have a decent bottom.

I was running a little late and then had trouble finding parking so I got there about 20 min late. As I walk up to the building I see a guy waiting outside. I figured he was the bottom. He said “hi” and I returned the hello, but I was generally busy texting the host to tell him I was there. The door swung open and the bottom went in and the host indicated I should wait outside. OK… Chances are he hadn’t told the bottom about me…

I wait for about 10 minutes and then figure things weren’t going to work out, so I try out Manhunt on my cell phone, but every time I try to send an e-mail to someone I get a timeout. I give up and wait a little longer. Finally at the 20 minute mark I’m a bit cold, but need to kill some time, so I give up, and walk into Central Park which is a couple blocks away. When I’m in the park for just a couple minutes I get a text asking if I left. Followed by another one that’s really apologetic for how long he had me waiting… I text back that I’m still close by and head back in that direction.

When I get back to the townhouse he’s left the door ajar and I walk in. When I get to the bedroom he’s got the bottom positioned on the bed ass just waiting to get fucked. He’s kissing the bottom and it’s clear the bottom isn’t going to be looking back to see who I am (even though he saw me outside, I’m not sure what he’s been told or whether he knew it was me at that point). I’m sorta hard, but kneel down to rim the bottom’s ass. I should mention the bottom was looking really good – great ass, lean, sorta lightly muscular body… His ass was a bit hairy, but he had a nice hole…

There wasn’t any lube lying around so when I was done rimming him I just spit on my dick and shoved in. He took it like a champ and within seconds I realized lube wasn’t necessary – he had the host’s load in him – and it must have been a fairly big load too. The hole felt all silky and wonderful – the way the Brazilian’s ass should have felt if he really had had 6 loads in him the other day. (Why can’t all bottoms have asses filled with cum?)

Even though his hole was all silky and wonderful I didn’t cum right away. The host had started off kissing the bottom – keeping him looking forward, not back at me, but then he switched and had the bottom suck his dick. After a while I was finally about to cum, and the host went back to kissing the bottom while I unloaded in the bottom’s ass.

I could tell from the scene that I was just there to breed the bottom and leave, so I just shoved my dick back in my pants (never did take off any clothes), and then I left… The bottom never did look back to see who I was.

After I got home I got messages from both the host and the bottom. The bottom was actually someone I had fucked before – a quickie pump-and-dump last fall. Since I had spent less than 8 minutes with him back then – most of it looking at his back while I fucked him, I guess I can be excused for not recognizing him when I saw him on the street. Given how emotionless and matter-of-fact the last hookup had been with him, this hookup was pretty much just par for the course – probably perfect in his eyes – though he did seem to have a connection with the host.

It had been a while since I’d done a real pump-and-dump. While I wish I hadn’t had to wait, it was still a really good hookup. Though it is a bit weird that the bottom was someone I’d fucked before…