With the New Year we should all try to make resolutions to have more sex (and never use a condoms). We all know barebacking is hot, but what exactly about it turns you on personally? (Pick up to 3 answers)

I know for me it’s a combination of a few things. 1) It feels SO much better, 2) the risk the bottom is taking is a total turn on, which is an extension of 3) the power/control side of bareback sex. If a poz top wants to breed a neg bottom he can – there’s really nothing stopping him. And the bottom can even be in control by taking the initiative to get loads from poz tops (who may not be intending to poz a neg bottom). In my case if I’m poz and don’t know it, then there’s a decent chance I’m pozzing all the neg bottoms I fuck.

But I’ve heard a lot of other reasons… What are your reasons for barebacking? Did I miss any big ones?

As I’ve mentioned before, I keep a spreadsheet of the guys I fuck. Helps me with perspective… Here’s the rundown for how 2009 was compared to other years…

So compared to 2006 and 2007 it was a decent year, but 2008 was such a good year it makes 2009 look pretty bad.

[Just in case  you’re wondering when I go to a sex party “new guys” gets incremented by the the number of guys I fuck (who I haven’t fucked before), but the whole thing just counts as one fuck otherwise. So the blackout gangbang at IML this year I added 9 guys to “new guys” but it just counted as one “time I fucked a guy” and since I didn’t cum there were zeros in the other columns. ]

If I had to guess, 2010 will probably be like 2009…

Load 2009-32

Yeah, I know, 32 is sorta bad for the year – maybe I’ll make it 33 today, but still that’s less than 1 a week. I would make a higher goal for next year, but 2010 looks like it will be dominated by renovating our new place (if we ever actually ever go into contract on it) so who knows if I’ll do better next year.

Anyway, I was planning on fucking this 22 y.o. black guy with a smokin’ hot body who e-mailed me, but I wasn’t hearing from him and finally gave up ’cause I was horny. At that point I just wanted to cum so I could get on with my day. A guy on BBRT was availalble, so we set things up.

Now the weird thing was that when I asked for him to unlock his pics he told me we’d already hooked up before. I checked my spreadsheet and didn’t see his profile. I checked the blog archive for that month but didn’t see him there either, but that was just the blog archive fucking up – he was actually there. At that point I was wondering if we had actually hooked up, ’cause his pics didn’t really ring a bell. Then he texted me and I my iPhone showed that he had texted me back in July as well and based on the time it was an early morning hookup. At that point it looked like we did indeed hookup.

When he showed up I definitely remembered him. And after he left I did eventually find the blog post from back then. The funny part was how similar the two hookups were – down to little details…

When he got here he asked to use the bathroom (like last time), he stayed in there a little while so like last time I sat on the bed and jacked my dick and got hard. And as a result that meant no tenderness – he just went straight to sucking my dick (like last time). And like last time he was a good cocksucker who didn’t let his teeth touch my dick. I let him suck as long as he wanted, but finally he stopped and it was clear he wanted to get fucked.

He got on all fours and I pushed him down onto his stomach as I pushed in. He was tight and I had only put a little lube on my dick, so it took a while to get in. I had taken a pill before he got there so I was ROCK hard. Between that, and the fact that I hadn’t cum in a couple days, I knew cumming would be no problem. His hole felt good… So I just tried to take my time fucking him, but I still managed to cum pretty quickly.

After I came I was still hard (thanks to the pill), so I just slow fucked him. I must have come a lot ’cause his hole got completely wet. I just slowly fucked him and then rolled him over on his side and kept slowly fucking his hole. Felt great ’cause it was so cummy.

Then he asked if I had fucked Dawson, which is really funny ’cause he asked the same exact question last time at pretty much the same exact moment in the hookup. I said yeah, I’d fucked Dawson, but it had been a long time ago now – Spring of 2004.

After a while of slowly pumping in and out of his cummy hole we stopped and he went to the bathroom (unfortunately, he probably pushed out my load) and then got dressed and left.

[BTW, speaking of Dawson – Treasure Island has a promotion on where you can get a boxed set of 4 Dawson videos plus a free t-shirt all for $69. If you don’t have the Dawson videos, it’s a really good deal. But the funny part is the t-shirt – it says “The Paul Morris Eugenics Project” on the back. Given that eugenics is basically “selective breeding”, but often associated with the Nazis killing of unwanted people it’s quite a phrase to put on a t-shirt. It hits on the concept of breeding, but also the overtones of death that many people associate with barebacking. Leave it to Treasure Island to “go there”.]

Load 2009-31

Admittedly, I haven’t been doing very well in the fucking department. Lots of distractions – really busy with work, plus the whole real estate thing – trying to find another place to live… There is progress on the real estate front, but nothing is finalized yet – so more on that later.

In the last month I’ve fucked 3 guys a total of 4 times and two of those were today and yesterday, so things have been really slow. The one yesterday I got a video of, so I need to do some video editing on that before I write it up.

Today I did another quickie with the Italian daddy who comes over on a pretty regular basis. It was sorta funny ’cause I still had the lights all set up from shooting the video yesterday, but he didn’t even notice them (or at least didn’t say anything). I mean they’re big professional lights – I’m not sure how you could miss them…

He started with a blowjob and unfortunately it was another one of his toothy blowjobs that get to be a bit painful after a while. I was pretty horny and the partial pill I took yesterday was still doing it’s job, so the bad blowjob didn’t really ruin it for me or anything, but after a little while I went and got the lube and then just fucked him.

It’s gotten pretty routine with him – I put him on his belly and pound him until I cum. This time he pushed his ass up a bit in the middle of fucking him. Normally that can be problematic with a lot of bottoms, but it worked and his ass felt really great and it wasn’t long before I blew my load up his hole.

He asked if he could suck my cock and he cleaned it off really well and I thought he was going to jack off, but he stopped and that was sorta the end of it.

I did ask him how long he knew he liked to get fucked. Turns out he’s always known even though “Catholic guilt” resulted in him getting married and having kids and only recently really coming out and being gay. For such a total bottom it’s surprising he’d wait so long… Next time I’ll ask him how much sex he had with guys when he was married…

I used to think Aiden Shaw was SO hot! You sorta wonder what happened to the old porn stars. So many of the ones I jacked off to when I was young are probably dead…

Well, Aiden is very much alive and kicking and he’s still sexy as hell. Here’s a video of him talking about his big dick. He’s aged incredibly gracefully and his accent is just wonderful to listen to.

A guy just wrote me the following letter. Thought I’d share it..

First off… Big fan of your Porn work. I would always search your name in my favorite search engines. But then I ran across your personal web page and started to read your personal blog page… I know that what you are talking about doesn’t always show all the aspects of you… meaning that in the context of what you are talking about(or selling/advertising), doesn’t necessarily show the “real” you, I was however,disappointed.When I looked at you, I saw a caring, responsible, loving person, characteristics that your blog doesn’t portray. I hope that you are more then what your blog portrays you as, ( an uncaring, selfish lover, only interested in his on satisfaction). In the real world, we as gay men want a satisfying sex life, along side a satisfying LIFE as whole, coming home to someone that loves you, not any “hole” that you can “fill up” and then send on his way. As a professional in the Medical business,( a mental health therapist), I can tell you that the “holes” that you are “filling up”, are actually lonely human beings looking for companionship anyway that they can, and feel that the only possible way to do this, if only for a short while, is with their ass in the air waiting for you to fill up, not only their asshole, but also the hole that they have inside themselves trying desperately to fill. But sadly, after you are through with them, it leaves them with only a bigger hole to fill the next time.

I hope that you take this into consideration when looking for you next “hole” to fill.

My response to him was this…

It’s not my job to fix the emotional problems of the bottoms I fuck. It sounds like you want me to form relationships and deep bonds with the bottoms I fuck. I’ve got a boyfriend and if I were putting my emotional energy into what you’re asking it would threaten the relationship with him. That’s not going to happen. When I fuck a bottom it’s no strings attached. In most cases I do cuddle with the bottoms afterwards, but chances are it’s just going to be a one time hookup. And I do mention cuddling and talking with the bottoms in my blog.The “empty holes” you’re talking about need meaningful friends. They need boyfriends. While I’m a firm believer that you can find those by having sex (I met my bf in a bathhouse and we’re still together 12 years later), finding friends shouldn’t be the the reason someone has sex. The people who try to find friends in sex often wind up in the PNP crowd and destroy their lives in the process.

So don’t lecture me about how I act towards the bottoms I fuck. Their problems aren’t going to be fixed through sex. They’ll be fixed by going out and spending quality time with friends, and by finding a boyfriend. I’m guessing the people you’re talking about are picky and have passed on many guys who would be really great boyfriends. And then when they find one it’s either the wrong type (someone who’s abusive), or they don’t know how to compromise and lose him… None of that is a sexual problem.

Let me make something really really clear… If you’re one of those holes he’s describing – ask yourself why you’re lonely. Choose to fix the problem. Go out and get involved with something and make some friends. Play a sport, sing in a choir, join an S/M group – whatever… And then give your friends the attention it takes to maintain the friendship. If you’ve got friends and don’t like coming home to an empty apartment/house – get a dog (and give it the attention it needs).

And if you find a boyfriend, treat him well and learn to compromise. When you feel like breaking up ask yourself what percentage of the relationship works. No relationship is perfect – if you dwell on what’s wrong, you will break up. Concentrate on what’s right. If what’s right isn’t enough, and you’re honestly not looking for perfection, then that’s a decent reason to break up. Or if there are serious issues like the guy being genuinely abusive – then leave (quickly). But I honestly think the reason why I’m still with my bf 12 years later is because we put up with each other. Overall we’ve got a great relationship, but there are times when we have big problems and little things that irritate each of us – but we put up with the things we don’t like and get back to what’s right – that’s why we’re still together.

Now, if you’re a “hole” then something in you likes the sex. You’ll definitely want to find someone who’s OK with random, no strings attached sex. Monogamy is probably a really bad idea in your case. Sexually, your boyfriend should get off seeing you get fucked or when he discovers someone else’s cum in your ass… I think sluts think they can’t have boyfriends. I’ve never understood that – what good top wouldn’t want to find his boyfriend’s ass is prelubed with someone else’s cum?

And for god’s sake – just because you’re a sub bottom doesn’t mean you have to be passive about getting into a relationship. Even subs can communicate what they want… “I’d love to stay here and have you fuck me all night”, “I’ll do anything you want Sir – if you want other guys to fuck me, I’m OK with that”, “You can call me anytime – I want as many loads from you as possible”… And if a sub can communicate what they want, then anyone can… Don’t assume you have to let the top take the lead in initiating the relationship – make it clear you’re available and interested (without coming off as too needy or desperate).

Anyway, enough of my soapbox. I know the holes I fuck are real people – but the “empty holes” aren’t going to have the emptiness filled by cum and anonymous sex. That takes real relationships and they take more time than a 15 minute hookup (or even an hour hookup)…

UPDATE:

I’ve corresponded with the guy some more… Turns out he used to be straight – was even married with kids and his boyfriend has “a similar background”. He’s in a pretty small town and has had sex with very few men. So bottom line he has a straight / small town sorta mentality about sex. He doesn’t even know anyone who’s really a cumhole – so his talking about them feeling empty, etc. was all just idle speculation. That sorta explains it, doesn’t it? Amazing how guys like that think they understand things they have no experience with.