Last couple of nights my bf and I have spent with someone I met through the porn business – he works for the company that runs a bunch of porn sites including Broke Straight Boys, College Boy Physicals and their new site Broke College Boys. There aren’t that many of us in New York who work on porn sites so even though he’s not into barebacking (a bad shitty fuck a long time ago sorta put him off raw sex), we hang out from time to time and talk business, etc. Anyway, last night we went to see fireworks at his place. He’s in one of those new condos along the Hudson – had an incredible panoramic view of all 6 of the fireworks barges in the Hudson.

Long story short there was a tourist from London who was hanging out with his boyfriend’s set of friends, we got to talking and it was his last night in New York. I could sorta tell the large gaggle of Asian guys at the party was a little fem for his tastes (sexually), so even though I was sloshed drunk from all the beer, jello shots, and vodka melon shots, my boyfriend suggested we go out for a drink at the Eagle. Given what he said was his type that was the only bar we could think of that might have guys he was interested in. So the three of us headed over to the Eagle (the guy he came with was in bed kissing another porn guy from Toronto when we left).

We get there and he was totally not into it. He’s into skinhead punks (good thing he lives in London). There were a couple guys there who were sorta his type, but not much selection. We used to have some of that in New York, but like the leather scene you don’t see much of any of it anymore. When the East Village boys moved to Williamsburg the skinhead punk types sorta died out. There might still be a little of it in the East Village, but very little…

So there was a bunch of guys in one of the corners and it looked like something might be going on. I mentioned that’s as close as we get to a back room so he plunged in, but not much of anything was happening – there was even a monitor with a flashlight making sure nothing was happening. When we got out of that corner we did see one guy giving a blowjob (briefly).

It’s like gay life in New York has completely lost it’s edge. There’s no leather scene any more, the skinheads and punks are gone, there are no good backrooms to speak of. It’s sorta sad. What’s happened to us?

I made out a little with the guy before we left the bar. Curiously he said he wasn’t into bears – his limit was cubs. I asked him what he thought I was and he said a cub – definitely not a bear. (Guess the definitions are different in London). It was nice being a little frisky with him, but ultimately I think we were both stretching our “type”.

Yeah, some of you are probably wondering where I’m going with a title like that. So, I’ll indulge you a bit… 😉 Last Sunday (roughly 2 weeks after IML) I started feeling really run down, Monday I had some coughing, Tuesday I still felt run down, Wednesday I felt completely back to normal and actually hooked up with the masculine piss bottom I fucked a year ago (got a video of it this time as well – write up is coming). Afterwards I went out for a drink at Rawhide, but the crowd didn’t interest me so I just stayed for one drink (plus I was driving – so I didn’t want to get drunk).

When I came home the walk from the garage to the apartment was torture. The stuff I was carrying felt like lead weights and at one point I even felt tightness in my chest. When I finally got home I just collapsed. I took a bath and tried to recuperate. Fast forward to about 4am – I wake up thanks to my dog who’s crawled on the bed. I get up and feel like shit. My lower back is KILLING me. I take a couple asprin, and some cough syrup and go back to bed. I don’t sleep well and wake up late.

Thursdays are a busy day for me ’cause I have to get a bunch of porn blog posts done. Without going into details I get in a fight with my boyfriend which turns out to be a huge fight, but I have to try to stay focused on my work. I feel like shit, but just push forward. By Thursday night I just want to crawl into bed, which I do.

By Friday I’m in sorta rough shape – initially the coughing can be controlled with cough syrup and the sore back with Motrin, but I still feel completely run down – so I just stay in bed most of the day. My boyfriend and I manage to patch things back up late in the day (which is a really long fight for us). My symptoms get worse as the day goes on and by the end of the day I can’t control the coughing – it’s pretty much constant. I sleep on the couch so I don’t keep my boyfriend up all night.

Today has been an incredibly rough day as well. Light fever on and off (which makes me a sweaty mess), coughing I can’t stop and the sore lower back (which had gotten a bit better) started getting worse.

Now that some of you think I’m going through the “fuck flu” I’ll burst your bubble… 🙂 What I didn’t tell you was my boyfriend has had similar symptoms – a few days before me. His horrible day was last Thursday and whenever he exerts himself he gets sick the next day or two, which is what’s happening to me. So whatever he’s got, I’ve got and given our lack of a sex life, it’s not sexual.

If’ I’ve got anything major it’s more likely to be swine flu than HIV. Why is it that you always get sickest on the weekends when the doctor’s office is closed? I’m not about to go waiting for hours in the emergency room, but I’d really like to know what it is and get something to control the symptoms… Oh well…

UPDATE: Saw the doctor today (Monday) and I have Bronchitis, but it probably started with something viral. Hopefully it will be over soon.

This is curious… Perez Hilton has pics of Oscar-winning Dustin Lance Black barebacking on his site… If you ever thought barebacking wasn’t mainstream, think again… 😉

[photos removed]

Frankly guys, barebacking is natural, it’s what real guys do in the privacy of their own bedrooms… Enjoy! (Though if you’re a celebrity you might think twice about having pics taken of you getting raw dick in your ass…)

So, my boyfriend and I bought a new HD camera last month the day before I went to IML. The intention was to shoot some porn, but for a variety of reasons that’s been slow getting off the ground. I’ve been talking to some guys and have some prospects, but my bf doesn’t really want me doing a site around the guys I fuck (like JakeCruise), even though I think I’ll get there eventually. I’m sure I’ll be in some of the videos we shoot, but it will just be part of what we shoot…

So we’ve decided to take a trip to Montréal next month and I figured I’d post something on Craigslist looking for guys who want to be in amateur porn. I’ve gotten some replies and finally someone responded who seemed like he could be a real sex pig, but as soon as I mentioned bareback he said he wasn’t comfortable with that. There are still things I can do with a safe sex bottom – oral, BDSM, watersports, etc. so I’m still hoping to work with him…

But it just struck me tonight – I’m not going to actually pay someone to put on a condom – that’s just so against everything I’m about, it’s not funny. There is one safe sex top who’s offered to do it for free – that I could see doing… I have no problem making money off condom porn, but I don’t want to put my money into it (except maybe for editing and distribution). I’d rather shoot an oral scene, but even that I’m not going to pay much for someone to do – maybe a bit more than I’d pay for a good solo scene.

The bottom line is I need to do what my heart is into and that’s bareback, preferably where the bottom gets a load. I’m also totally into doing kink – S/M, watersports, fetish, etc. That’s what interests me and that’s what I see myself doing in 5 or 10 years, so might as well avoid the distraction of other stuff now and just get headed in the right direction…

If any of you are interested in being in porn (which is still a bit amateur and low budget at the moment), e-mail me and let me know. For now I’m looking for guys in New York and Montréal. I’m especially looking for New York based tops. There’s a bottom coming over from the UK in a couple weeks who’s up for being filmed in a gangbang, and the bottom I organized a gangbang for last year wants me to do another one. This time he wants it to be a conversion scene and have it be videotaped. I know last year when we did his gangbang he had been taking poz loads but his last test had been neg. Haven’t heard back from him as to whether he’s still neg. Either way, I think we’d need to tone down the conversion aspect of it… That’s got all sorts of legal complications and I’m not sure any billing company would process the payments for a site that’s got conversion videos. It’s probably up there with scat – legal in most places, but really difficult to distribute.

If you’re wondering, I’ve been a bit under the weather the past few days and busy with work before that. The masculine piss pig bottom I videotaped last year wants to hookup again and videotape it. If I don’t do it tomorrow then he’s gone for two months, so hopefully I can have that happen and have a good fuck to report about…

This video goes over everything you need to know about “traditional, biblical marriage”. But just remember – while it turns out it’s very inclusive – it just doesn’t include you…

Also available in HD on YouTube…

Once again – playing with the new camera… This is Cyon Flare singing at the IML 2009 Pecs & Personality Contest. I’m not really sure what gender to call her – she’s sorta a drag queen, but hasn’t gone completely female… Either way, great voice and a good entertainer – it’s always good to see a drag queen who doesn’t lip sync (though I still love the ones who do…)

As with the last video, you can see the video above in HD on YouTube…

And like Jeffrey Payne, she ended her song with a call for inclusion – “All inclusive, not exclusive”… Hopefully that is what will happen at IML and things will change.

As far as camera work… You’ll see I mostly messed up on audio – the music was too loud and I didn’t turn down the inputs so there are times when the sound is pretty fucked up. Lesson learned.