Load 2012-42

Before I start – I should mention I checked my spreadsheet and I’ve now given more loads this year than any other year other than 2008. The 2nd best year had been 2010 with 39 loads given, but I’m well past that now. The goal now is to beat 2008 when I gave 61 loads. I need to give 20 more loads this year – shouldn’t be too hard despite having a slow start to the year. When I’m not sick I’m averaging 9 or 10 loads a month, and I’ve got 3 1/2 more months to go.

And another point of follow-up from past posts… I went to see a colorectal surgeon about the anal fissure I’ve had for 20+ years. She said it was pretty deep and serious. There’s even scar tissue that migrates down the fissure and is collecting in a hard lump at the bottom of the fissure. (I was worried I had warts when I felt it). The good news is that she’s put me on this cream that I put up my butt 3 times a day. There’s a 2/3rds chance it can completely cure the problem. If that doesn’t work, they can inject Botox into the area to relax the sphincter muscle to let things heal. Or the last line of defense is surgery. I’m going to be religious about using the cream – I really really want it to work. I hate needles, an really want to avoid surgery. Then again, my fissure has been pretty stubborn about not going away.

So it’s taken me a few days to get back to normal after being sick for so long. Even now my stamina isn’t was it was. So I figured I’d take it easy with hooking up. Once again, I did a bad thing and on Tuesday found myself cumming while jacking off. I figured I wouldn’t be hooking up until at least Thursday, but then the opportunity arose on Wednesday to fuck. Since I wasn’t 100% I went for the skinny black guy in the neighborhood. Including this load, he’s gotten 3 of my last 5 loads. I almost think I’m seeing a bit too much of him.

Thing is, he’s practically on call. He lives a few blocks away. I don’t think he works. So if he’s in town, he’ll come right over when I text him. This time he was there a half hour after I contacted him – that included cleaning out and walking over to my place. I gotta say that’s convenient for me… 🙂

The hookup was pretty straightforward. He came over, we stripped down. I had him get on all fours so I could rim him. I fucked him on his belly and I came in his ass.

I did experiment a bit when I was fucking him. With some bottoms it feels better to fuck them at an angle. I’ve even seen pics of guys fucking 180 degrees around. That’s gotta feel sorta cool. I just went 30 or 45 degrees off and the sensation just wasn’t as good as it was with the two of us lined up. He’s SO skinny – like he has practically zero body fat. As I was fucking him I could feel how skinny and frail he was – it was sorta hot.

Afterward I came, we had a bit of a quiet moment. I kept my dick in his ass, rolled us onto our sides and we just laid there for a while. He’s got an “outy” for a belly button and combined with him being skin and bones every time I’d brush over it, it felt weird – like it was a tumor or something. We haven’t had a really non-rushed quiet time before. It was nice. We talked a little, but mostly just laid there in silence.

Finally my cell phone went off with a text. I was sorta done and it was a good excuse to get up (turned out to be an amber alert from the City of NY about a little girl who had gone missing). He threw on his clothes and was gone a little later. I’m sure next time I need a quick easy hole, he’ll be over… 😉

Speaking of skinny… For some reason, I haven’t regained any of the 10 pounds I lost when I was sick those two weeks. Is it possible it was fat, not water weight? (That would be a deficit of 2500 calories per day – almost impossible, but not quite). Anyway, I’m now around 219/220 (down 34 lbs off the peak or 29 off my average high). Problem is, because I lost 10 pounds quickly while I was sick I do have some loose skin issues. When I bend over my pecs look more like saggy boobs, and my bf was kind enough to mention a few minutes ago that my ass looks a little saggy (lol). The saggy skin will fix itself over time if I continue to loose weight at a more manageable 3-4 lbs a month. And IMHO, even with the saggy skin I look better thinner. It’s just nice not to have such a big gut, and not to have to carry all those pounds up staircases with me, etc.

I wasn’t really planning on hooking up today. I knew I wasn’t at a 100%. When I got on BBRT & A4A I set my status to “Not Looking”. Despite that a Latino who’s been hitting me up a lot lately convinced me he should come over. I told him I might not be 100%, but he wanted to come.

He got here a bit late, ’cause he had sent a confirmation e-mail and I didn’t see it until just before he was supposed to be here and he didn’t leave until I responded. [That’s the sort of think I gave him the cell number for – but whatever…]

He gets here and he’s come from work and needed to clean out. I jacked my dick a bit and was a little concerned – “junior” wasn’t really responding.

He came out and wanted to suck my dick, and he did for a moment, but I knew the only way to get hard was to rim him. He wanted legs up, which was fine, but the problem was he didn’t seem 100% clean. I was rather “delicate” in my rimming. On any other day he would have been just fine, but today he wasn’t quite enough to get me going.

Well, he did get me just hard enough that I could fuck him, but I wasn’t completely hard. I wanted him to roll over on his belly, but when he pulled off my dick to do so I just wasn’t hard enough to go back in.

He sucked on my dick – which considering that I didn’t think his hole was perfectly clean was a bit daring – nothing like a little ATM where the dick isn’t quite clean… (yuck!)

Bottom line, we never really got back in the swing of things. At one point he was hard and I could see he was thinking of jacking off – but I think he was bugged by my not being hard. For god’s sake – I told him it was day #7 of being sick…

Another part of it was I haven’t taken Cialis in forever. When I feel better I’ll take one and fuck like a bunny for a few days 🙂

So my 9 day load is still in my balls. Tomorrow it’ll be a 10 day load. Maybe I’ll feel good enough to hookup tomorrow…

Load 2012-40

Over a week ago now I hooked up with this guy who wanted an anonymous pump and dump. (Sounds good to me). I get down there, ring the bell, go up and the door’s unlocked so I go in. It’s a small, but nice loft and he’s in the bedroom area on all fours, head down. What I see is a pretty nice ass so I start rimming him. I didn’t take off my clothes – figured I’d make it a real quickie and I wasn’t particularly hot, so didn’t need to take off my clothes to avoid overheating…

I rim him pretty well and get fully hard. I stand up to find some lube and start fucking and he turns around, takes off the blindfold (which I hadn’t noticed) and asks me if I’d like a drink – juice? water? I’m thinking WTF? I’m in the middle of having sex with you and you want to interrupt things to serve beverages? [Guess he was a flight attendant in another life.] I politely say ‘no’ at which point he suggests/insists I take off my clothes… I didn’t really want to argue about that one so I took off my clothes. I just got this sense from him that he was high on something (I’m guessing not Tina since from what I hear and have seen guys on Crystal just want to get fucked).

Once we were naked I just wanted to fuck, but I got this vibe off the bottom that it was too soon to fuck. It was like he had some etiquette handbook from Miss Manners that said you needed to serve beverages and snacks and have a conversation before fucking. Which was baffling ’cause this was the same guy who left his door unlocked so a complete stranger could find him ass up, blindfolded in bed. It was actually sorta funny.

Well, I just pushed past his reservations and told him I wanted to fuck, and not long after my raw dick was up his hole – though he did have me take out my PA. It being over a week now the details are a bit fuzzy. But I got him down on his belly and gave him a decent fuck. True to form for me I didn’t last all that long. When I came in his ass quickly I think I must have violated another rule in his Miss Manners etiquette book – I think he was a little shocked he was on the receiving end of a session that was basically “slam, bam, thank you ma’am”.

There was something about the vibe that spooning with my dick in him wasn’t right – which is funny – ’cause what he wanted was a longer hookup. When I got up he once again offered a beverage – I think he just wanted me to hang around a bit longer or something. I get it – especially if he was tweaking… But it was time to go. It took a while to get my clothes on and my PA back in, and we talked a bit during that time – he seemed like a nice guy… One thing he said when I was standing there naked in front of him was “you look better than your pics – more of a cub, not so much of a bear.” I have been loosing weight, but still consider myself pretty bearish. Still, it was nice to hear.

Load 2012-41

Sorry for writing this up a week late – I’m on my 5th day of being sick as a dog with viral gastroenteritis…

So last Saturday my “nigger” fuckbud came over. I know he’s versatile and always wants to top me. It’s not like I was going to let him, but I’ve hooked up with him enough I didn’t mind if he fantasized about it… 😉 So I tried to douche a bit – I wasn’t shooting for 100% clean, ’cause I had no intention of getting fucked – just clean enough that he rimmed me or something it wouldn’t be disgusting…

He gets here, we strip down, he asks how things are going and we actually get into a rather involved conversation about the problems white folks face in Harlem, but we eventually wrap that up and get down to playing… I rim him to get me hard, then let him suck my dick. Then while he’s sucking my dick we get into sort of a 69 position and I start rimming him some more. I spread my legs and make it clear he can play with my ass (I know from experience he wants to, but usually I don’t let him do anything down there).

All of a sudden something felt a little weird down there and he tells me I just expelled a bunch of dirty water all over the bed. UGH! I really am not made out to be a bottom! There was still a little water up inside me and it came out at the wrong moment. So I get up, pull the sheets off the bed, go into the bathroom and clean them a little bit, and then come back and we try to resume. It took me a little while to get back into the swing of things but we get there.

It’s just he always wants to cum when we hookup and I find it’s hotter for me if he cums before I do. I figured he could get off playing with my hole and thinking about fucking me… So I lift my legs, show him my hole, and he jacked off while I taunted him about how he’d like to cum inside me… He kept wanting to fuck me – said he didn’t care if I was a little dirty… He just wanted to be inside me. But getting fucked wasn’t something I was interested in. I mean while the idea of taking loads is hot, 1) I hate getting fucked, 2) he has a big black cock which would make me hate getting fucked even more, and 3) I was dirty and I hate shit. Instead I tweaked his nipples while he came about as close to fucking me as you can get without actually fucking – and that was enough to get him to cum.

I then put him on all fours and shoved my pierced dick in his ass. I may not get fucked, but he most certainly does. I fucked him briefly on all fours and then pushed him down on his belly. He really wanted to jack his dick, but that just wasn’t going to happen. He’s a pretty well built guy with a big hard meaty ass so finding the right position took a while, but I finally got there. I was telling him he was a good nigger hole – made for breeding, he told me to fuck him hard. Happy to take that queue I slammed in and out of his ass and pulled out longer on each stroke so the ball on the underside of my dick would tear up his hole a little each time I pulled out.

As I got close to cumming I changed things up a bit – “You really wanna poz me don’t you? You want your poz load deep in my neg ass, don’t you? I know you wanna be my poz daddy…” I knew he’d like talk like that but he responded even more strongly than I thought he would. I came a few seconds later and then he was so worked up from the poz talk he wanted to jack off again. I’d cum, so this time it wasn’t going to be about my hole. He just laid on the bed and jacked off and asked me to suck on one nipple while I played with the other. This was what I was trying to avoid by letting him play with my ass in the beginning, but he was a bit in a frenzy so I knew it wouldn’t take him long to cum, and it didn’t – he blew a decent sized load all over his belly a few moments later.

All in all it was a hot hookup… It’s fun to see a guy get so into it…

Load 2012-38 & 39

So with life settling back to normal I’ve wanted to be a little more experimental sexually. I saw an Oxballs cock sheath advertised and it looked cool – figured it would make my cock thicker so I could give bottoms a harder, rougher fuck. So I ordered it and it happened to get here yesterday – 4 days before they said it would – literally a few minutes before the black guy from the neighborhood arrived to get fucked, so I figured I’d try it out on him…

I was little worried I wouldn’t be hard enough to use it, but that wasn’t an issue… It fit right over my half hard cock and I had no problem pushing right in his ass.

I was actually a little disappointed – here my dick just got A LOT thicker and the bottom just took it like it was nothing – like it was my regular cock. I hadn’t told him I was going to use it on him or even shown it to him. You’d think he’d reach around to figure out what I was fucking him with – I mean that can’t feel like a normal dick.

I fucked him pretty rough (that is the point of toy like the cock sheath), and while I was fucking him I was calling him my “nigger boy”, etc. And just to be clear – this is a black bottom who is only into white guys and likes race play. But I gotta say the whole nigger/slave thing – just wasn’t fitting somehow… I mean it was fine, but it didn’t feel like the edge of the N word was doing it’s trick. I think part of the issue is that he wasn’t saying anything back that built on that theme… Even, “Yes Sir, thank you Sir” would have been good. Or better yet “Yes Massa”. But anyway…

I was thinking when I ordered the cock sheath that it would decrease my sensitivity and it would take longer to cum as a result. Wrong. I came just as quick. Yes, the sensitivity was less, but it was also a different sensitivity. The cock sheath really squeezes your dick – and that’s always helped when I used to jack off, etc. So so much for getting me to get the fuck to take longer.

Unlike the other cock extenders that Oxballs has, the whole point of this one is that it’s open at the end, so when you cum, the bottom gets your load. After I came I fucked slowly in and out a bit and then pulled out and took off the cock sheath. He never did ask about it. Go figure. Probably has to do with the fact that he was “a little high” when he stopped by.

This morning I figured I’d play with it a bit and take a few photos. What I realized is that it’s quite good with semi-hard cocks. I can see why the PNP crowd would probably like it. As you get soft your dick just recedes into the sheath a bit like this…

But because it holds your dick so tightly you actually stay pretty hard. I could actually see wearing it at a sex party ’cause you can fuck when you’re half-hard. It’s like your cock is inside a dildo and you’re fucking the bottom with a dildo. When you do finally get hard, you’re all there and you can dump your load in the bottom.

Today the same bottom texted me saying he just took a 2 week load, so while I try not to fuck the same guy twice in a row, I told him to come over. Unfortunately I couldn’t taste the load when I rimmed him, and his ass didn’t feel all that silky when I fucked him. 🙁

What’s sorta funny is this time I didn’t use the cock sheath and he had a problem taking my dick – took me a while to get in and the ball on the underside of my dick (from the curved barbell in my PA) was a bit of a problem. The day before he was a bit high and doing poppers – what a difference those two make!

Anyway, it was a 9 minute pump-n-dump including taking clothes off, chit chat and cleaning up, and then he was on his way… It is handy to have someone a few blocks away who is practically on-call when I need a hole.

Load 2012-37

There’s a bottom who I’ve been in a lot of contact with lately, but timing always sucks. Well, Saturday morning things worked and I went over to his place. He told me he’d have the door unlocked and he’d be on the bed face down, ass up. It all sounded pretty good, but honestly I was sorta in the mood for something a little more relaxed. Still, anonymous is always a good way to start…

I got to his place, the door wasn’t ajar, but since the doorman had just called his number and he had told me he’d be waiting on his bed, I tried the knob and it was unlocked. Usually in anonymous pump & dumps the lighting is pretty low, but all the blinds were open and there was tons of light (not a problem – just more of an observation). He had an alcove studio, so I went over to the alcove and there he was just as he said he would be.

I wasn’t in a rush so I took off all my clothes and got down on my knees to rim his hole. The hole was a little musky, but seemed pretty clean so I had some fun with it – sucking on it, etc. Too bad there weren’t other loads in there. I love when I suck on a guys ass and he can push out cum from other tops. That got me hard, so I stood up and went to fuck him. There were several bottles of poppers around, but I didn’t see any lube, so I got things as wet as I could with spit and pushed in.

Long story, but I had pushed stretching my Prince Albert too far to quickly (ball stretching & PA stretching at the same time is a bad idea) and then slept in the bigger ring which irritated it, so I had to take it out, give it a few days of nothing and then start all over. I had just put the curved barbell back in the day before and even it was pretty sore and irritated. But he took the extra ball on the bottom of my dick without a problem.

He had a nice tight hole – I almost wonder if he was clenching to give me a good fuck. But what was interesting was that I seemed to hit bottom in his ass really easily. That doesn’t usually happen unless the guy is around 5’4″ and this guy was maybe 6 inches taller than that. Usually I love hitting bottom but every time I did my PA would shoot out a bit of pain. It wasn’t particularly happy about fucking when it was so tender.

I lasted maybe a little bit longer than usual, but still came pretty quickly. It was at this point that the bottom said “stay inside me” – which I intended to do anyway, but the problem was one of position. I tried briefly to lay on top of him, but I’m a big guy and didn’t know whether my weight was too much for him. I went to roll us over one way but didn’t want to be looking into the mirrored all (too much looking at each other for an anonymous fuck). So I rolled the other way, but it was a little awkward – like he didn’t really want to or he wasn’t expecting it or something.

There was just something a little off with the chemistry at this point. Best I can describe it is the bottom wasn’t relaxing and just being in the moment. Still, I pumped my dick in an out of his hole. Since I had cum I wasn’t 100% hard, and with the position we were in my dick was a bit bent. But I found if I pushed with my fingers where the bend was that I could continue to fuck him pretty well.

One thing I did was pull my cock so it would almost come out. This was the thing that caused the bottom so much pain a could weeks before – when the ball on my PA repeatedly gets inside the sphincter it can be painful. Though a couple weeks ago i was really slamming into the guy’s ass – this was just a relaxed, slow fuck. I chatted briefly with him afterwards and he didn’t mention any pain – so I don’t think that was the case this time. Still, I imagine he got the sensation of feeling the ball on the PA every time I pulled out.

As I was starting to get soft I pulled out. I really wanted him to clean off my dick, but he didn’t volunteer and I didn’t force the issue. I got up and felt his cummy ass.  I couldn’t resist so I licked some of the cum up (tasted good!). All in all the bottom seemed to want a quickie pump-n-dump, so I figured I’d leave. He said I could take a shower or whatever, so I went into the bathroom and tried to clean my dick – not because he was dirty, but because I knew my PA needed the cleaning. I pissed a little in his sink and then used soap and water for the rest.

When I came out he said I could stay longer, but I wasn’t really feeling that vibe. Honestly I think he read the blog saw some of the pump-n-dump hookups I’ve been having lately and tried really hard to give me what he thought I wanted. You can’t fault a bottom for that, but I sorta wish he hadn’t tried so hard.

As I was dressing he apologized – he had looked back and seen me. Clearly he was trying to live by a rulebook he got off the blog. Guess he missed the part about how I like to start pretty anonymous, but the ending doesn’t have to be. Then I realized my keys weren’t in my pocket, so we looked around for them a little (turns out I had left them at home). Then I was off.

All in all a good fuck…. While the bottom tried to hard to please, what he proved to me is he’ll probably give me whatever I want. I could probably rough fuck him with my big PA, or even get into BDSM with him and he’d take it light a champ – ’cause he works so hard to please. So in the end it’s all good…

There was a little funny incident as I left the building. As I came in I saw what I thought was an older leather queen on his Harley outside the building. He had the leather vest on with pins all over it – very old school leather bar. Then as I was coming down the elevator these two guys were talking and by the conversation it seemed one was the coop board president. I walked behind the president as he left the building and the old leather queen was still outside and they started chatting about how he didn’t know if he was going to go for a ride upstate because it might rain. I just thought “only in New York” are regular people so accepting of difference. I mean there’s a chance the guy wasn’t gay – that he was straight and part of some aging motorcycle club, but it was the West Village and the guy looked 110% like the old guys you used to see at the LURE on a Saturday night. I mean full leather with all the pins stuff to prove their track record in the community. And here was this older (probably) Jewish guy who probably had 2 kids, 4 grandkids treating the leather queen and his issues like they were completely normal. THAT is why I live in New York.