So question for all you bottoms… If you think the top came, but he didn’t actually cum, do you want to be told the truth or would you rather go away believing a happy misconception?

This bottom from the neighborhood came over Saturday morning. There was something about him that looked grungy. I knew he had “partied a little” the night before, but looking at him I suspect it’s a regular thing for him. (Yet one more reason not to do meth – you’re literally more attractive if you don’t do it). I usually avoid guys who’ve been partying (they’re usually bad lays), but since he was so close and I just wanted a pump-n-dump I figured why not. So he came over.

He was a perfectly decent bottom physically, etc. but his hole was really loose. I didn’t really do the right things to my dick. I tried to cum, but the load just never came. Thing was there was this moment where the bottom probably thought I came. I did come close, it’s just nothing came out. And after that point I just naturally slowed down and pumped his hole like I was coming down off an orgasm. I wasn’t trying to fool him or anything – it’s just how things went for me naturally.

So it probably seemed like a completely regular pump-n-dump to him. I just didn’t cum. And my body acted afterwards like I had cum – my sex drive was pretty low the rest of the day. I’m pretty sure the bottom thought I came. When I pulled out I wasn’t sure if my dick was completely clean so I went to the bathroom to clean up. When I came out he was putting on his clothes.

Usually I mention to bottoms that I haven’t cum. But it just felt like that wasn’t necessary this time – that it might actually spoil the moment. Should I have told him? I’m thinking he may remember it more fondly if he thinks he got the load.

Loads 2013-40 & 41

Earlier this year I started experimenting a bit. Even though I’m a top I’ve found the idea of getting cum in my ass is a huge turn on for me. Problem is there’s a lot about bottoming I just don’t like and you sorta have to bottom to get cum in your ass. For starters I don’t like having to clean out. On top of that I find the actual act of getting fucked painful and unpleasant more often than not. And being dominated isn’t really compatible with who I am 90% of the time, but I’m never going to be a pushy bottom – in my mind getting fucked is an act of submission. And I absolutely hate getting spit-roasted (I feel completely out of control). I’m not going into details about how I’ve come to those conclusions, but let’s just say I’ve experimented enough to figure out that I’m still very much a dom top…

But in my experimentation I found I sorta love having cum in my ass. I’ve even frozen my own cum and then shoved up my ass before going out. There’s just something incredibly hot having cum in your ass – especially when you got it from some anonymous stranger. So the question is how does someone who doesn’t want to get fucked manage to get cum in their ass? After thinking about it – it’s actually sorta simple – have the other guy jack off and then put the head of their cock into your hole just as they cum. I mean plenty of guys jack off after I fuck them – why waste the load? The load doesn’t get dumped nice and deep, but I still walk away with a cummy ass!

A week and a half ago I hooked up with the black guy in the neighborhood who I fuck on a regular basis. I was having a low-libido day – my dick just wasn’t performing the way it should. I noticed my fuckbud was pretty hard, so I told him to jack off and cum in my hole. As soon as his load was in me my dick jumped to life and I put him on his stomach, fucked him and dumped a load in him.

Then a few days ago I was super horny. I hadn’t cum in 3 days. I was supposed to shoot a scene for Bear Film’s Hairy & Raw, but it got canceled a few hours before it was supposed to happen. I had taken an herbal pill the day before and a Cialis that morning, so I was rock hard and ready to blow. The black athlete who I fucked a few weeks before was online and came over. I think he’s incredibly hot but there’s something about him… I have a really hard time cumming with him. The first time we fucked I gave him a load, but the second time I just couldn’t manage it. This time the best way I can describe it was that I felt the orgasm (throughout my body), but I didn’t feel the ejaculation. He clearly wanted to cum, so finally I told him to jack off and put the head of his dick in me as he’s cumming. I don’t think he quite understood ’cause he put it in a little, then pulled out started and cumming on my taint. At that point I had to tell him to put it in a little and finish cumming in my hole. I then pushed the cum on my taint down so it went into my ass.

That got me hard enough to fuck again, but I wasn’t rock hard and no orgasm came. So that tells me I did indeed seed him earlier – I just must not have felt it for some reason. I had my big PA in earlier that day – I’m thinking that’s the issue. I think I’ll go down to rings that are no bigger than 2ga. Bigger seems to mess up my orgasms. And I texted him asking if a load came out. He said, ‘no’, but some soap had come out. Ummm… That wasn’t soap! (That was only the 2nd load he ever took, so I’ll excuse him for not knowing it was cum).

I need to find a clear way to tell guys I want cum in my ass, but don’t want to get fucked. Like the athlete, guys just don’t understand the concept. And if I’m briefly getting a little bit of dick in my ass I guess this means I’m a “vers top” now.

If you’re in NYC and like breeding tops, get in touch. Just realize there’s not much of a chance I’ll actually let you fuck me. Still, a quickie jack off into my ass would be perfect when you’re out at a place like The Eagle.

I had SO much fun at CumUnion on Saturday night! I didn’t cum, but who gives a shit? It was just hour after hour of fucking – with a nice variety of of guys. As you can see from the title I fucked 16 guys. The space has a maximum capacity of 160 but 175 different guys were there over the course of the evening. So I basically fucked 1 in 10 attendees. If you were there and bent over taking dick and loads chances are I had my dick in you.

I actually lost count a few times so 16 is an estimate, but pretty close. And then there’s the issue of fucking a guy who’s bent over sucking someone’s dick and then later you wonder “was this the guy I was fucking earlier?” After all you don’t always see the guys clearly – they’re just a hole for your raw dick at times.

And I could have fucked even more. My dick would perform pretty well, then go soft for 15 or 20 minutes, then perk up again for a while, then go soft for a while. It was like that all night. During some of those down times there were some bottoms who wanted me to fuck them, but I wasn’t up for it at that particular moment. One in particular was one of the hottest guys there (IMHO). He was this smooth mid-to-late-20’s Latino. Nice slim body. When he first came in I swear he got fucked by guy after guy for probably 30 minutes. I stood in line to fuck him, but some of the tops were taking a long time so I went to look for other hole. Later he would have bent over for me, but the timing was wrong. The best part was he was versatile. Had a nice average sized dick on him and at one point I was laying on this “thing” (don’t know how to describe it) catching my breath and cooling down (since it was the coolest part of the place) and he was fucking this hot bottom right next to me. I love it when cumdumps are actually vers and share all that DNA they get.

Before that guy showed up the guy I thought was the hottest guy there was this really little Latino guy. I mean he was clearly under 5′ tall. A lot of guys who are that tall have weight issues, but he had a great little body. The size difference between us was sorta hot. The only down side was that I don’t think he realized how much I was into him. We kept being flirty, but he was a little hesitant about actual action. Finally I saw this other guy fucking him, so I knew he was up for getting fucked. A little later I came across him and turned him around and guided my raw dick up his ass. He took it like a good bottom. The position was a bit off so it wasn’t as good as I might have hoped, but it was hot. I mean it’s not very often that you get to fuck someone who’s like 4’9″ – I mean that’s the average height for a 9 year old – it’s a little pervy when you think about it. At one point I almost leaned over and told him that I thought he was the hottest guy there, but I didn’t do it. In hindsight I should have. I think he needed the ego boost.

Most of the black guys there tops. But there was one black jock who was flagging light blue right (cocksucker) who I saw bent over getting fucked. Immediately I wanted to fuck him, but he was busy and hard to get to. But maybe 20 min later the stars aligned and he bent over for me. He had one of the best holes there. I actually got close to cumming, but unfortunately I didn’t. Still, he was probably my best fuck of the evening.

When I got there initially I wore my big Prince Albert. And I fucked maybe 4 or 5 guys with it. EVERYONE seemed to want to touch it and the bottoms wanted to feel it up their ass. But all the tugging on it made it sore and I had to take it out. I tied it really tight to my boot laces and continued on with the evening. But I gotta say I get the same reaction at the Eagle on jockstrap night. I’ve gotten in the habit of letting the ring poke out of the edge of my jockstrap. Everyone looks and everyone who’s even somewhat bold wants to play with it. It’s a great way to get action 😉

The one disappointing fuck of the evening was this mid-20s twink. Cute as a button. Looking at him I’d guess he was a recent ivy league grad or something. Looked completely clean cut and innocent – except for the fact that he was bent over letting anyone and everyone fuck him. Problem was he had really long legs and he didn’t bend them very much so his hole was too high for a lot of guys. The first time I fucked him he was sucking some guy’s dick. He kept moving around positioning himself for the cocksucking which would throw me off. All in all he just never focused on the needs of the guys fucking him. Needless to say he wasn’t getting fucked as much as he might have if he had been a better bottom.

In the entire time there I think only one or two bottoms said they wouldn’t fuck raw – so clearly the fact that CumUnion is promoted by sites like BBRT and my Breeding Zone helps keep it pretty bareback. In the ads for the one this coming Saturday they’re designating this small loft-like room as the cocksucking and safe sex area. But it wasn’t a safe sex area this past week – I fucked a fair number of guys raw up there.

Let’s see – other memorable bottoms… One was this skinny tall Asian guy – probably on the young side of mid-20s, but might have been pushing 30 – couldn’t quite tell. He had this really small dick that almost never got hard. I think I was his first fuck of the night and I fucked him with my PA. He wanted it, but as I was pushing this huge ring in his rather tight hole I was wondering whether it was going to work. But he was a good bottom. He put up with my ring and later in the evening I saw him legs up on the medical exam table getting fucked by top after top for probably 30 or 40 minutes solid. He was clearly a “power bottom”. A power bottom with a tight hole is a great combination. He’s another guy I wish I had given my number to – I’d like to fuck him again and give him a load.

There were plenty of other bottoms who I fucked. One guy was this tall, somewhat ‘thick’ guy who couldn’t take my PA, but as soon as he saw it was out his face lit up and he wanted me to fuck him. Then there was this really really skinny guy. He must have had a 24″ waist. And there was the older poz-looking guy who was smooth all over with really pronounced nipples. He had a rather large bottle of lube in his boots. It was funny seeing someone pull out something so big given that everyone was naked. There were a few average stocky-ish bottoms who were good cumholes.

I had taken a Cialis earlier in the day, and then I drank a 5 Hour Energy right before I got there. I had never tried one before. True to it’s name it gave me almost exactly 5 hours of energy. But when the 5 hours were up I could feel it. My dick just refused to get hard again. It was over, so I finally just left and went over to the Eagle. One of the bartenders there had told me he’d give me a VIP card next time he saw me and I wanted to go pick it up at a time when there were no lines. It was after 2am so I was expecting there to be a fair amount of action going on, but I was surprised. There was a little cocksucking in some of the corners, but that was about it. I was really disappointed. There’s way more action with a smaller crowd on jockstrap night. I guess the moral of the story is if you want guys to get sexual make them go naked (or close to it).

On that point I’m sorta rooting for Anthony Weiner for mayor right now. I’m hoping with his sexual history he won’t be a prude when it comes to sex in bars. It’s really pretty lame that you can’t fuck in NYC bars and clubs these days – and the bathhouses suck. We need a mayor who will make enforcement of other things a higher priority and lay off a bit when it comes to consensual sex between adults. (Or, it could be that with his sexual history Weiner will over-compensate and keep the crack downs up – who knows?)

I’d sorta like to go to CumUnion again this Saturday, but chances are the boyfriend will want to do something. Can’t abandon him two Saturdays in a row…

I just got back from a hookup with this Dominican guy up in Washington Heights. I should have been working, but I was horny and figured if I blew my load I’d be able to get back to work and really focus on work. Typically I only host during the day ’cause I don’t want to take the time off of working, but this time I decided I’d travel.

I’ve fucked the guy 2 other times and both of those times I’ve been able to cum, but this time I wasn’t so lucky. I get there and we take off our clothes and I’m loving his body… It’s naturally smooth with just a little hair in places like around his hole. He’s got a little muscle on him – but it’s more of a “lean muscle” sorta look – the type of muscle you see on guys who are just naturally muscular.

Apparently he’s not into much other than getting fucked. He pulled out his dick (a nice big uncut dick) and jacked it a bit, but he didn’t suck my dick, or even suck on my nipples… I felt up his body a bit (liked that), and then he got into position with his ass up on the edge of the bed. I spread his feet apart and started rimming him. That got me pretty much rock hard, so I grabbed the lube, but it was nearly empty and sorta bad/thin/watery lube (Gun Oil H2O).  I pushed in and pushed him onto his belly.

Initially it felt really good. When I was rock hard and thick everything was fine. But since I had given a load the night before I didn’t stay that way and when I went down even just a little bit his hole didn’t rub my cock quite right. I gave him a pretty long fuck – and a decent fuck, even if I do say so myself. But I never could get the position quite right or something.

And despite the fact that it was a nice day out and sorta the perfect temperature, he had his windows closed and it was warm in his apartment. I started sweating. Whenever that happens I know I’m probably never going to be able to cum. I kept fucking but I was getting hotter and hotter and sweating more and more.

I rolled him on his side and fucked him a bit that way, and then finally pulled out as I started going soft. I mentioned to him that I had overheated and he went and opened a window in another room, but it didn’t really help. Be brought me paper towels to wipe up but I used them to mop the sweat off me instead of cleaning my dick.

We laid there for a little bit and I was feeling up his body… It felt really good. I love his ass and couldn’t stay away from it so I went back to rimming him. That got me hard again and I fucked him a little more. But didn’t last long. So laid down a little more. But again I couldn’t stay away from his ass. I put him on his side curled up in a bit of a ball and then put a pillow by his ass and just laid there eating him out. I really do like his body and his hole…

I tried fucking again, but never really got completely hard. So finally I just told him I was going to go…

Other than not being able to cum, it was a decent fuck. I guess next time I’ll have to have him come to my place where I can control the temperature so I don’t overheat.

So I hooked up today with someone who’s within walking distance. After I said ‘yes’ to him I started wondering whether it was a good idea. I hadn’t taken any type of “enhancement” pill in a couple days and I had eaten just an hour or so before. Sometime it seems like my dick gets food coma or something. Sometimes I think my blood flow is going to my digestive track rather than my cock.

Anyway, he comes over and we get down to business. I eat out his ass. It’s a bit hairy, but not too much so. Actually here’s  a pic… (He wanted me to take pics/videos…)

His hole was a nice hole to rim. But unfortunately my dick wasn’t really cooperating. I got up and tried to take a video of sticking my dick into his ass, but I just wasn’t hard enough. I took out my PA and started over rimming him and then fucking him.

I did finally get in him, and gave him an “OK” fuck I guess. Then it would sort of peter out, and I’d stop and rim him some more. Then I’d fuck him again, etc. That repeated several times… I did a few quick videos and I put one of them up on my tube site (click to see it)… The video is just taken with my iPhone, and while I’ve lost 30 pounds, my gut keeps getting in the way of the camera – lol… [I need to lose more weight…]

As you can see, I’m hard enough to fuck, but not fully hard. It just wasn’t my day… Finally I just told him I didn’t think I could cum and he started jacking off while sucking on my dick. When he came I scooped up some of his cum with my fingers and fingered my ass with it. While I have almost zero interest in getting fucked, having a little bit of some stranger’s cum in my ass was sorta hot. That got me a bit boned, so I went back to fucking him…

But that fuck was just a repeat of the others… I was hoping for better results, but finally just gave up.

I owe the guy a load… He was a decent fuck, and within walking distance… But I was just having a bad day…

So after the flop with the bottom I intended to have as my fuck boy for the weekend, I wound up making a connection with the bottom who was at the Friday morning gangbang. In many ways he wasn’t at all my “ideal type”, but what I find is that on weekends like MAL I tend to go for guys who have a certain approach to sex – in particular they respond very strongly to touch. Caress them and they just snuggle up to you. That, and an intense desire to get fucked trumps having a perfect body, etc.

Here are some pics of him that I snapped one morning…

You can see he’s even got a hairy back – something which is usually a turn off for me, but somehow I didn’t mind it with him…

You can’t see it in the pics so much, but he had some muscle on him. It felt nice to feel the curves in his shoulders and arms. And he had pretty powerful legs. In many ways he was built sorta like I am now, only with a bit more of a gut.

But what attracted me to him was that he seemed emotionally needy. I know that may sound like a weird compliment, but he craved attention and I liked giving it to him.  I remember a similar (though brief) connection with a pup I met at the first MAL I went to 3 years, and then with the beefy “Canadian Sub” I hung out with at the last MAL I went to 2 years ago. While the pup was cute and young, it usually seems rare for me to have connections like that with young “hot” guys.

And it wasn’t like I was giving him all that much attention. I mean he was constantly making (positive) comments about my body, my dick, my musky body odor, etc. but I wasn’t all that verbal with him. Instead, the attention I showed him was more physical – lots of touch, and just wanting to spend time with him…

One thing about him that was a bit amusing was his love of bear/pup stuff. He loved to say “woof”. I wasn’t quite sure how to respond. I mean that level of bear play isn’t something I really get into. At the same time it was sorta cute that he was doing it. I just wasn’t going to “woof” back at him. I probably should have gotten into a little puppy play with him. I tried flogging him at one point but my mojo was rattled a bit when he told me my aim was off and I was wrapping his neck/shoulder. I pride myself in not doing stuff like that. The conditions weren’t quite right – it was hard to get a good swing in with all the furniture in the way, but still I shouldn’t have made that mistake. And I definitely should have videotaped some of our fucks. He said he would be into it, but I never set up the camera for one reason or another. There were a number of things I coulda/shoulda done with him that I didn’t, but I was happy just to spend quiet time with him, fucking him…

The first day after he got the 6 loads in the morning gangbang he went with PortaUrinal and me to a diner he knew about for breakfast. He needed to get some sleep before going to work. I needed some sleep too, so we came back to my room and slept much of the afternoon. Whenever I’d have a hardon I’d just wake him up by sticking my dick in his ass and fucking him. That pretty much was typical of the entire weekend. We spent a lot of time togehter – he was with me Friday during the day. Then he went to work, then he was with me from the wee hours of the morning on Saturday until he had to work that night. Then he came back after work and stayed all of Sunday. Sunday night I slept alone ’cause I needed a good sleep for the drive back to NYC, but he came by after I got up, got a couple loads, and then we went out for brunch. So he was nearly my constant companion for MAL… It was nice… I mean we fucked A LOT, and there was a good connection…

He had a nice hole – it felt good. But there was something about his hole that never got me to cum in his ass – it just didn’t rub my dick quite right or something. That’s actually sorta typical for me with beefy guys – I’m not sure why. I mean other guys had no problem cumming in him – so it wasn’t him per se. We tried all sorts of stuff. I tried a pig hole on him – but it seemed a bit big for him. Then we tried my cock sheath on him. I was surprised at how easily he could take that. That actually felt really good – and the head of my dick was hitting something and I nearly came. Then one morning he decided he would get the pig hole in him, so he put it up there, but when I stuck my dick in him he had this intense sensation and came without even touching himself like 10 seconds later. I never really got to fuck him properly that time.

I now wonder if I didn’t cum in his ass at some point – I mean I fucked him a lot and I got close a number of times – and there have been times in the past when I cum and don’t realize it. It was a bit of a bummer that I couldn’t cum easily with him. I would have liked to have given him load after load. But he seemed happy just with all the fucking. And in a way I did give him loads – they just weren’t mine. He got 6 loads Friday morning, and then another 2 loads Monday morning. He was good about taking loads – he wasn’t really into some of the tops (especially the black guys), but he took their loads to please me…

In hindsight one thing I would have like to do would be give him a sleeping pill and invite guys over to fuck him while he was semi-knocked out. Thing was, I didn’t think I had sleeping pills, when I actually did have them. I had seen this little container on the floor after one of the gangbangs and didn’t really investigate was it was. Finally I looked at it and saw a bunch of pills, but didn’t google their markings to figure out what they were. The morning I was leaving DC I finally looked up the markings on the pills. Turns out there 3 types of sleep aids in there, including Ambien, plus some other stuff. If I had known I had Ambien I would have given him one and watched as guys fucked him when he was just semi-conscious. I gotta say I did like see him getting fucked by other guys – it always seem to get me hard…

The one confusing thing about him was that he told me he was neg, but he didn’t really want to talk about it. I brought the subject up a few times in different ways, but he never really shared how he felt. So I’m thinking either he just doesn’t want to think about the risk he’s taking, or he’s actually poz and lied just to be one of my gangbang bottoms. He did tell me that he had talked to someone who told him I only hooked up with neg guys. That’s not true – what was true was that my goal was to only have neg guys as my gangbang bottoms, but I’m fine with fucking poz guys… I’d say most of the guys I fuck are poz.

The one load he did get from me was a piss load – I filled his ass with piss at one point. It was  big load too… Like PortaUrinal, he’s a piss bottom, but after hearing PortaUrinal say my piss was too strong for him, the cub didn’t want to drink any either – which was too bad…

He was actually pretty versatile. He kept playing with my ass and suggesting he should fuck me. Now that the doctor says my fissure is healed, I guess I could have let him fuck me, but it’s rare for me to even think about bottoming let alone do it. And that weekend wasn’t one of those times…

So all in all it was a good weekend in part because of the cub… I like having these sort of “weekend boyfriends” on sex party weekends. PortaUrinal is great company (we had adjoining rooms and spent a lot of time together), but having someone to sleep with and stick your dick in every time it gets hard, is pretty nice 😉