So question for all you bottoms… If you think the top came, but he didn’t actually cum, do you want to be told the truth or would you rather go away believing a happy misconception?

This bottom from the neighborhood came over Saturday morning. There was something about him that looked grungy. I knew he had “partied a little” the night before, but looking at him I suspect it’s a regular thing for him. (Yet one more reason not to do meth – you’re literally more attractive if you don’t do it). I usually avoid guys who’ve been partying (they’re usually bad lays), but since he was so close and I just wanted a pump-n-dump I figured why not. So he came over.

He was a perfectly decent bottom physically, etc. but his hole was really loose. I didn’t really do the right things to my dick. I tried to cum, but the load just never came. Thing was there was this moment where the bottom probably thought I came. I did come close, it’s just nothing came out. And after that point I just naturally slowed down and pumped his hole like I was coming down off an orgasm. I wasn’t trying to fool him or anything – it’s just how things went for me naturally.

So it probably seemed like a completely regular pump-n-dump to him. I just didn’t cum. And my body acted afterwards like I had cum – my sex drive was pretty low the rest of the day. I’m pretty sure the bottom thought I came. When I pulled out I wasn’t sure if my dick was completely clean so I went to the bathroom to clean up. When I came out he was putting on his clothes.

Usually I mention to bottoms that I haven’t cum. But it just felt like that wasn’t necessary this time – that it might actually spoil the moment. Should I have told him? I’m thinking he may remember it more fondly if he thinks he got the load.

Load 2013-45

Halloween day I hooked up with this guy who was in from out of town. I wasn’t quite sure how it was going to go. I knew he had been to the lunchtime sex party downtown. He texted me and said he got 3 loads at the party. Then he was off to a friend’s place before coming to me.

The timing was a bit tight. My dog was at the vet having surgery that day. I was supposed to hear when they were done with her and jump in the car and go pick her up. Right before the guy showed up I called them and they said “the vet will get right back to you” so I figured she would call right in the middle of me fucking this guy. When he got there I explained the situation and apologized in advance for the interruption. But it made me feel a bit rushed.

We took off our clothes and the guy had a nice body. Sorta hairy in a nice way, well-proportioned, etc. I hate to say it, but I’ve sorta forgotten how we started (it might have been with a blowjob – not quite sure). It’s been a few days now and I was a bit distracted at the time. What I do remember clearly was when I had him get on all fours to rim him. His hole just looked perfect. The best way to describe it was “experienced”. It was the hole of a power bottom. Some holes just have this combination of elasticity and musculature that is pretty much perfect in my book – they can grip tight or open up and be loose. I rimmed him pretty aggressively, but never did taste any cum.

I then lubed up and pushed in and simultaneously pushed him onto his belly. His hole felt as good on my dick as I thought it would – while I couldn’t take cum, I could definitely feel the loads… I usually cum pretty quickly, but with me feeling like there was a time crunch I did even a little faster than usual. So that means I blew my load in no time. I asked him if that was load 5 – he said ‘no, load 6 – my buddy gave me at least two loads.’ I love slutty cumholes. I pumped his cummy hole for a bit more and then pulled out.

In my quest to take loads without actually getting fucked, I had asked him in advance if we could try to dump the loads from his ass into mine using a funnel. We tried and it didn’t go very well. I don’t think the neck of the funnel got past my sphincter, so the loads just stayed in the funnel. Then I tried dumping the loads from the funnel into a condom and pushing the condom into my ass. I spilled a whole bunch trying that. So all in all very little got into my ass. Oh well, I tried. After the fact I realized I should have used a Lube Shooter. Duh. Next time I fuck a cumdump, I’ll give it a try.

I was thinking of going out to a sex party that evening. The funny part was that our vet is in the same building as the sex party. But by the time I got my dog time was tight and she was in a bad way and needed my attention, so I figured it would be bad to leave her alone, so I skipped the party.

Load 2013-42

After yesterday’s let down where I didn’t feel my cumshot (and may not have cum), I was determined to have some decent sex today. I got online this morning. Didn’t really want to hookup up right then, but figured I’d see what might be available later. I had a bunch of guys interested (at least casually), but the one that caught my eye was this masculine little Latino. When I say little I think his profile said 5’4″ – but he might have been stretching it a little. I’ve got a weakness for little guys so we exchanged numbers and soon we were texting.

I had a call scheduled with my accountant but then that got delayed, so hours passed, but we kept texting and he was still interested when I got done with my call. We decided I’d go to him. He was in a bit of an awkward location – sorta close and sorta far away. At first I was going to take the bus, but I decided walking would be just as fast. After all the delays he seemed eager for me to get there.

Of course, after a long walk he’s in a 5th floor walk up. I was out of breath when I got up to his place. He said something like “Well, this is my place…” like he was expecting a reply of “Great place”, but I didn’t know what to say – it was rather barren and the walls were painted funky colors. Only as I was about to leave did he tell me that he had just moved in. At that point I was able to give an honest, encouraging, “Oh, yeah, this is a lot of space for one person…”

The other thing he told me when I walked through the door was that he had just gotten hit by a car. He pointed to his knee which was totally swollen. It looked pretty painful. But clearly he was still up for hooking up. In hindsight I gotta give the guy credit – he gets hit by a car, but still drags himself and his bike up 4 flights of stairs and waits around for a hookup before going to the hospital to get checked out. Gotta love a pig who puts sex before semi-urgent medical care.

I was sweating from the walk and he had no A/C and no fan. I start stripping down and was worried about overheating. He dropped to his knees and started sucking my cock – oddly putting the bulk of his weight on his swollen knee. If you read this blog very much you know blowjobs aren’t really my thing, so I had him get up on the be. I was intending to rim his (furry) ass, but he laid sideways, so I gave him a blowjob while I fingered his hole.

Playing with his ass was enough to get me hard, so I got up and let him suck on my now hard cock. I think he was expecting me to be smaller. He didn’t seem all that happy that I was as big as I was. After less than a minute of sucking me he told me to get on my back. I thought he was going to suck me some more, but he only did that for a few seconds to get my cock wet with spit and then he put some spit on his hole and proceeded to sit down on my raw cock.

I had violated one of my rules in hooking up with him – we hadn’t actually discussed whether he was OK with bareback – and then I had just walked a really long way for the hookup. If had wanted a condom it would have been a disaster. But luckily he was a good little pig and thought nothing of sitting on a strangers bare dick.

I remember back when I used to be a young vers twink – that sitting on a cock is a great way to get accustomed to getting fucked. That’s pretty much what he did… He sat on my cock just long enough to open up for me, then he said “I want you to fuck me for real” – he got off and got on all fours. For a little guy he had really long legs and his hole was well above my cock, so I told him to get on his belly. As I shoved in he kept saying “go slow”. I did go slow, but then I hit bottom pretty quickly in his ass and he tried to pull off from the pain of it.

I gradually increased my speed, but every time I hit bottom he’s flinch in pain and complain, so I started doing shorter strokes. It wasn’t all that easy for him, but he took it like a good bottom. He was probably also in pain from his car accident injuries. Anyway, he couldn’t take that much then he asked me to stop. I think he wanted me to pull out, but that wasn’t going to happen so I slowed down and didn’t go in so deep. But he really wanted me to stop. I still didn’t pull out but I stopped pumping his ass for a bit, but then I slowly started going in and out again. I could tell he really didn’t me going deep so just fucked the head of my dick in an out of his hole.

I should stop and say I had him legs together on his belly and being so much bigger than him I sort of enveloped him. I was really sweaty too – my belly and his back were drenched with sweat. The short break helped me catch my breath and then I gradually started fucking him again – but I didn’t go deep at all. But the sensations still worked the sensitive tip of  my dick so I could tell I was going to be able to cum. And cum I did – my orgasm came, then a few seconds later I felt spurt after spurt of cum going into his ass.

For some reason after I came he wanted me to pull out. We laid there for a few minutes talking. I noticed his elbow was all skinned from the accident as well (poor guy must have been in all sorts of pain). Then he got up and went into the bathroom and as best I could tell shit out my load 🙁

Then I went to the bathroom, tried to piss, but only a little came out. I tried to find a towel to dry myself off but the only one I could find was  damp one on the floor – so I used that. I put on my clothes, we chatted a little more very briefly and then I was on my way. He apologized a bit for rushing me out the door, but he said he wanted to go to the hospital to get checked out. In hindsight I should have told him to go to an urgent care place – they’re far better than the ER when you’re not dying.

Hopefully we’ll fuck again. Just wish he were a little closer.

Loads 2013-40 & 41

Earlier this year I started experimenting a bit. Even though I’m a top I’ve found the idea of getting cum in my ass is a huge turn on for me. Problem is there’s a lot about bottoming I just don’t like and you sorta have to bottom to get cum in your ass. For starters I don’t like having to clean out. On top of that I find the actual act of getting fucked painful and unpleasant more often than not. And being dominated isn’t really compatible with who I am 90% of the time, but I’m never going to be a pushy bottom – in my mind getting fucked is an act of submission. And I absolutely hate getting spit-roasted (I feel completely out of control). I’m not going into details about how I’ve come to those conclusions, but let’s just say I’ve experimented enough to figure out that I’m still very much a dom top…

But in my experimentation I found I sorta love having cum in my ass. I’ve even frozen my own cum and then shoved up my ass before going out. There’s just something incredibly hot having cum in your ass – especially when you got it from some anonymous stranger. So the question is how does someone who doesn’t want to get fucked manage to get cum in their ass? After thinking about it – it’s actually sorta simple – have the other guy jack off and then put the head of their cock into your hole just as they cum. I mean plenty of guys jack off after I fuck them – why waste the load? The load doesn’t get dumped nice and deep, but I still walk away with a cummy ass!

A week and a half ago I hooked up with the black guy in the neighborhood who I fuck on a regular basis. I was having a low-libido day – my dick just wasn’t performing the way it should. I noticed my fuckbud was pretty hard, so I told him to jack off and cum in my hole. As soon as his load was in me my dick jumped to life and I put him on his stomach, fucked him and dumped a load in him.

Then a few days ago I was super horny. I hadn’t cum in 3 days. I was supposed to shoot a scene for Bear Film’s Hairy & Raw, but it got canceled a few hours before it was supposed to happen. I had taken an herbal pill the day before and a Cialis that morning, so I was rock hard and ready to blow. The black athlete who I fucked a few weeks before was online and came over. I think he’s incredibly hot but there’s something about him… I have a really hard time cumming with him. The first time we fucked I gave him a load, but the second time I just couldn’t manage it. This time the best way I can describe it was that I felt the orgasm (throughout my body), but I didn’t feel the ejaculation. He clearly wanted to cum, so finally I told him to jack off and put the head of his dick in me as he’s cumming. I don’t think he quite understood ’cause he put it in a little, then pulled out started and cumming on my taint. At that point I had to tell him to put it in a little and finish cumming in my hole. I then pushed the cum on my taint down so it went into my ass.

That got me hard enough to fuck again, but I wasn’t rock hard and no orgasm came. So that tells me I did indeed seed him earlier – I just must not have felt it for some reason. I had my big PA in earlier that day – I’m thinking that’s the issue. I think I’ll go down to rings that are no bigger than 2ga. Bigger seems to mess up my orgasms. And I texted him asking if a load came out. He said, ‘no’, but some soap had come out. Ummm… That wasn’t soap! (That was only the 2nd load he ever took, so I’ll excuse him for not knowing it was cum).

I need to find a clear way to tell guys I want cum in my ass, but don’t want to get fucked. Like the athlete, guys just don’t understand the concept. And if I’m briefly getting a little bit of dick in my ass I guess this means I’m a “vers top” now.

If you’re in NYC and like breeding tops, get in touch. Just realize there’s not much of a chance I’ll actually let you fuck me. Still, a quickie jack off into my ass would be perfect when you’re out at a place like The Eagle.

Don’t think I have the energy to do a blog post on each of the other 5 guys I fucked while I was playing hookie from blogging. So let me just do a quick rundown…

Load 2013-34

After getting over being sick I hooked up with the hot little muscular Latino who’s become a bit of a regular. I can’t tell you how much I LOVE fucking him. Besides being really hot, his hole just feels incredible. He was the perfect way to break a 3 1/2 week dry spell.

Then there was this hot otter I fucked off Scruff. I fucked him the day after the hot little muscular Latino and I was frustrated because I couldn’t cum. Luckily he was in it for the fuck, not the load (he had wanted me to pull out when I came but I told him ‘no’). But I did manage to give him a decent fuck so he went home happy.

Load 2013-35

The next day I fucked the twink who had gotten upset last time when I didn’t pull out like he asked me to. We had had a few exchanges back and forth on A4A and I was thinking he wasn’t really into me, but he came back for more. Something had changed in him since I fucked him a few months before – he was there specifically to get the load. I think he now may actually like getting abused a bit when he’s getting fucked. Glad he learned his place and I hope he’s getting a lot of cum in that skinny little twink ass of his. 😉

It was after him that I got what I thought was food poisoning and what my boyfriend thought was something I picked up from rimming some guy’s ass. If my boyfriend was right it was the twink who gave me whatever it was (it only lasted a day or two). Maybe he knew he had something and wanted to get back at me – who knows. Or it could have been food poisoning.

Load 2013-36

A week and a half later I fucked this incredibly hot black guy. Short, young, beefy, and muscular. As I was fucking him I thought he probably had been an athlete (and recently at that). Later I found out I was right. Anyway, he was pretty nervous. He almost never barebacks, and he takes loads even less often. I guess we had talked about me being on PrEP so he felt safe, but he reconfirmed I was on PrEP like 2 minutes after I came in him. He’s a sweet kid and he wants to see more of me and even hang out and be friends. He might come over today – we’ll see. Would love to have him as a regular butt boy.

Load 2013-37

I followed the hot black athlete with a Latino who was equally hot in a different way. When I saw him I thought he was probably a dancer. He didn’t confirm that exactly, but what he said indicated that I was probably right. He had the most incredible lean muscular body and a really muscular ass. I had worn my little curved barbell PA and didn’t think it would be a problem, but then I had a problem cumming. Or maybe I came and didn’t feel it. After a while my dick started acting a bit like I had cum. But after taking a breather I took out the PA and went back at it. This time I came – and not just a little – it was a huge load.

Actually, looking over those 5 fucks they were pretty incredible. All of them were really hot bottoms – each in a different way. Now I just need more fucks like that!

Load 2013-38

A week ago, last Sunday morning, I fucked a guy I’ve fucked before (a long time ago – back right after he tested poz). The funny part is back then I remarked about him being hotter than his pics and it was true this time as well. I walked over to this place and when he opened the door I was pleasantly surprised. It had been almost 5 years since we fucked and I forgot how hot he was. When he stripped down he was this hot scruffy otter with this really great facial hair.

He got down on his kneed and went to work on my dick. I was in a bit of a mellow mood so wasn’t in any rush. When I got hard I just let him keep sucking my dick. At first I was fucking his face but he kept choking and gagging. So I stopped and let him do the work and things worked much better. He was able to get it down his throat without gagging.

The blowjob felt good, but after a while I wanted to fuck, so we moved around and got onto his bed with him on all fours, but as I pushed in I pushed him onto his belly. It took a little while to cum, but given the work up with the blowjob it didn’t take all that long before I blew a nice big load in him.

As we laid on the bed with my dick up his ass it struck me that he had a hairy back and that’s usually a total turn off (I used to ask guys with hairy backs to wear a t-shirt), but with him I didn’t mind at all. It really worked on him somehow. I felt up the hair on his chest as I pumped slowly in and out of his ass. His chest hair is beyond hairy – he’s truly furry – and it felt great. It was like a big thick shag carpet or something.

As I was getting dressed he mentioned he wanted to fuck me. That wasn’t happening, but it was nice to hear I turn guys on that way 😉

He’s not that far away – I need to hookup with him more regularly.